2 ♕ The Hangover [Phone/Action]

[godaime]

[ A - 849 Goldberg Street ]

[ When the sirens began to ring, the only thing Tsunade could do was wake and dash downstairs. There, she encountered her package. Regains from Christmas. She was hesitant to open them during Christmas, given their lack of marking, but, now, without any clue of what would be inside, she decided it would be best if she could open them. Her first one? A picture of a bunch of paperwork from home. ]

What on Ea-[ BOOM

Within the seconds of Tsunade's statement the house seemingly explodes into paper filled chaos. Stacks and stacks of paperwork begin to torrent around the living room, and the living room door bursts wide open, with paper flying out of there by the forests. If you dare to take a look to see what the hell just happened, you'll get a Tsunade who's sitting down with paper up to her shoulders before her pet pig, Tonton, stark naked and without her expensive pearl necklace, pops out of the paper with a fierce oink! ]

[ B - Phone.  ]

Ah, this is probably the worst hangover I ever had. [ Her voice sounds haggard and raspy. She sounds exhausted and weakened by all accounts. ] I can't even remember the last couple of days. What the hell did I drink....? [ She knows what really happened, but, she wants to synthesize as much information as possible and for that, she has to play dumb ] 

[ C - The Post Office ] 

[ With the realization that the paperwork had her entire life story and biography in it with the mysteriously missing parts filled in with her journal that has a day by day summary of her life, Tsunade realized it was time to go to the post office. On the way there, you see a very, veryold lady walking into the office. If you're in there, you know what happens. Tsunade finally made a trade and is, within a blink of an eye, transformed to her younger state.

If you're waiting outside out of curiosity, Tsunade emerges young and not wrinklyas ever. Her loyal pet pig is by her side.  ] 

Ah, Tonton, now that that's out of the way, let's get going. Oink!

[ D - Anywhere! ] 

[ There is a pig following you. Just a random pig. And no matter how much you try to shake it off, it just won't leave you alone. It'll continue to follow you down many streets, with its nose slammed into the ground like a police canine unit. Yep. She doesn't speak, she doesn't talk, she doesn't do anything but follow. ]

[ E - Olney's Tavern ]

[ Tsunade, with her trusty pet pig in her purse like Paris Hilton and chihuahuas, sits at the bar, wallet ready and eager. ]  All right, bartender, make some magic for me. This damn town took two weeks away from my memory, and, in return, I'd like to forget whatever the hell I've been doing from now until the 27th. One Long Island Iced Tea. By the gallon even, I don't give a damn. 

Comments

[queen_of_swords]

We strike hard and fast, the fewer deaths the better. I like for my snow to stay nice and clean. Besides, the skirmishes are nearly as often as they used to be when I first took over.

[godaime]

Striking hard and fast should be a goal of every army. I don't see why a person should just delay it and risk more lives. That's just poor and senseless leadership over the people who put their lives in your control.

[queen_of_swords]

Oh, I do know a few people who would prefer to wait and attack at the "right time" during a battle. They don't realize waiting can ruin their chances of winning.

[godaime]

Well, I have nothing against using times where the opposition would resting against them or anything, but, waiting to engage an enemy that's so close is pointless. Combat is going to happen whether the army likes it or not. Being unwilling to attack just jeopardizes everything, unless you're stalling for a surprise attack from behind or something.

[queen_of_swords]

[She nods.]

I do like surprise attacks, they usually bring the battle to an end much faster with the enemy tripping up at being caught off guard.

[godaime]

One time I led a surprise attack onto the village leader himself. He was overwhelmed so he retreated but we managed to take out a variety of the high level village officials. I hate when they happen against me though, but I've been able to repel every last surprise attack I've ever came into contact with. Or, at the very least, I was able to make sure the number of lives lost were minimal. Although, in the end, no lives were lost at all. [ Thanks to Pain reviving her villagers! ]

[queen_of_swords]

I can see how that would be annoying, but if anything, we learn from them and become better strategists.

[godaime]

Well, there's always a learning experience somewhere. Doesn't mean I have to like those little shits, or what they do.

[queen_of_swords]

Of course not. So, do you have a weapon of choice?

[godaime]

Who needs a weapon when you've killed someone just by grazing them with your fists? [ ...BARE HANDS OR NO HANDS. Bring it. ] My strength at home is legendary. There hasn't been a single person to match it yet. I've killed people by merely poking them before.

[queen_of_swords]

[She looks around and lowers her voice.]

You don't happen to sparkle when you fight, do you?

[godaime]

Sometimes I do when I use chakra, but that's because there's energy collecting to keep my skin and body from tearing under the pressures of my own attacks. [ And add this with blue punches, and how she can make fragments in the ground that look like sparkles just by punching them and you have a closely related relative, Olivier! ]

[queen_of_swords]

That's quite interesting. We're not sure why it happens to us, but I wish there was a reason like that.

[godaime]

Well, I guess you guys are so spectacular you have your own second effects. That's really special. [ ...She'll try to find reason somewhere. ]

[queen_of_swords]

I don't know about that. We're, okay, maybe we're not your average Amestrian family.

[godaime]

Well, the best families are all a little abnormal. Doesn't change it from being genetic, possibly.

[queen_of_swords]

Oh, it's definitely genetic, jut sparkles are a bit feminine for me...

[godaime]

Feminine things can be just as strong and tough as manly things. I'm sure there's some way where even you make sparkles look like one of the toughest, and most aggressive things on the planet. [ She doesn't see anything wrong with something being feminine. ] Besides, if used correctly, it could be a great distraction tactic. "Did Olivier just really spa-" sword through the head. [ She knows how to cheer you up, girl! ]

[queen_of_swords]

[She chuckles.]

Well, when you put it that way, I suppose they aren't so bad. People here really won't expect them if I ever get them back, and a nice distraction is always a welcome battle tactic.

[godaime]

I bet you could even enhance them to the point where they briefly blind someone. [ She laughs. ] With a couple of mirrors hidden in convenient places, their eye sight wouldn't last twenty seconds against you. [ THE BENEFITS OF SPARKLES: TSUNDERE LEADER EDITION. ]

[queen_of_swords]

[Her eyes light up at the mention of using them as a weapon.]

I'm sure my sword could help with that, too.

[godaime]

Now we're certainly talking! You know, I might be able to regain Konoha's entire arsenal, in theory.

[queen_of_swords]

And I could regain the entire Briggs arsenal, and the Armstrong estate, even! We could really be set if that happens.

[godaime]

Well, I could probably regain the Hokage Mansion. That'd be a pretty nice celebration and information trading place, especially since I installed a gambling hall and bar in there.

[queen_of_swords]

Then you wouldn't need to make one. I know people have gotten labs and airships back, so why not mansions?