Drink Count: 17 || New World, New Home

[eyesofaserpent]

[Forward dated to January 16.]


A. [Action: 852 Goldberg Street, ridiculous o'clock]

[The alarm klaxons jarred Crowley out of a comfortable sleep. The demon sat bolt upright and blinked his yellow snake eyes blearily. It took him a minute to realize that something was off about the room he was in. The shadow of the tree outside wasn't quite right. The wallpaper was different. His "wife" didn't look the same.

His wife didn't look the same.

He jumped out of the bed, blessing under his breath.]

Bollocks.


B. [Action: 852 Goldberg Street, later morning]

[He checked to make sure his Bentley was in the garage. It was. He also found his puppy and all her accessories in exactly the same places they had been in 915 Bilko Boulevard, only in this new house. How strange.

Crowley was dressed in a smart black suit and red shirt that had once been scratchy slacks and a hideous jumper. He was also, of course, wearing his snakeskin shoes and sunglasses. He sat at the kitchen table, drinking a poor excuse for a cup of coffee. He was going to have to go shopping.]


C. [Action: 915 Bilko Boulevard, around noon]

[He can't stop himself for wanting to check on Kyon. He couldn't leave the poor boy alone without at least checking to see if he was alright, right? He drives on over and parks in the driveway. The demon strides into the house as if he lives there. Which he did up until this morning.]

Kyon? Are you in here, kid?


D. [Action: Olney's Tavern, late afternoon]

[Crowley's looking a bit irritable behind the bar. What the hell is with this town?]

What'll you have?


E. [Phone: Locked to Aziraphale]

[Crowley's just a little on edge when he's able to get to the back of the tavern to make his phone call to Aziraphale. He paces as far as the phone cord will let him and he's hissing a bit.]

Pick up. Pickuppickuppickup! Bloody hell Angel, this is not the time to neglect your bloody phone!

Comments

[kingofshadows]

Could I get a new body? I've always wanted to try blond hair and surfing, maybe a bit of tanning. It's terrible having to brood in my study all day pretending to be a vampire; vitamin D deficiencies like you wouldn't believe.

[eyesofaserpent]

That might be pushing it. They're pretty awful about handing out bodies Below. Though I suppose you could possess someone.

[kingofshadows]

I'd rather not have a disembodied voice constantly pestering me about returning his body. I'll just have to haunt you. Pick up some chains to rattle. Take moaning lessons.

[eyesofaserpent]

You think that would scare me? I can always bring you back down to Hell.

[kingofshadows]

I changed my mind. You're a terrible friend.

Here, you should try to make up for it.

[He pushes his glass back in Crowley's direction.]

[eyesofaserpent]

Any specific requests?

[kingofshadows]

Oh.

Whatever makes me wake up tomorrow morning with the worst headache.

You know how it is.

[eyesofaserpent]

[He mixes up a zombie and sets it down on the counter.]

We'll get you that hangover, mate.

[kingofshadows]

Do you ever get those? Can you wave your hands and make it go away? I'd be madly jealous.

[Down it goes.]

[eyesofaserpent]

Normally, yes. Here, not so much. I'm learning to not drink as much as I like.

[kingofshadows]

[Grimsley fishes in his pockets and comes up with some coins.]

Make one of those for yourself. I'd hate to deprive you of the experience; apart from which, you're really quite good at this.

[eyesofaserpent]

Oh, I usually get plenty do drink here.

[Still he mixes himself up a complicated drink that involves gin, egg white, fresh citrus juice, and some other ingredients. He starts to shake it and doesn't stop.]

And don't worry about the money, mate. One of these drones is going to foot your bill.

[kingofshadows]

Oh. How thoughtful. I've never thought to make friends with any; I just stopped being very good at playing pretend after the age of six.

.........You're going to say you do mind control, aren't you?

[eyesofaserpent]

[He lets out a bark of laughter, still shaking away.]

No, I add it to their tabs. They never notice.

[kingofshadows]

Ah.

Hm. Not quite as interesting. I was actually hoping you'd say 'yes'. I pretend to be uninterested by you, you know, so I don't look quite as stupid being excited about these things.

Were you going to drink that or are you waiting to spray it in my face?

[eyesofaserpent]

Well, if I had full use of my powers I could use mind control,but Mayfield hasn't seen fit to give that back to me.

[He snorts and sets the shaker down, breaking the seal. He then pours it into a glass filled with ice and tops it off with soda water.]

Hardly. It's a Ramos Gin Fizz.

[kingofshadows]

[Grimsley leans forward with some interest.]

Was that the name of the drink or the demonic incantation you use for mind control?

[eyesofaserpent]

The drink. I don't need an incantation to control someone.

[kingofshadows]

That was a particularly clever joke the likes of which are usually much worse at this point of drunkenness. Do laugh.

[eyesofaserpent]

[He offered him a chuckle.]

Sorry. I'm probably not drunk enough.

[kingofshadows]

You most certainly are not. I daresay you still only see one of me, much removed from the ten fine upstanding young men I see before my own eyes.

[eyesofaserpent]

Ten? Well then.

[He leans over closer to Grimsley.]

And we're all devilishly handsome, I suspect.

[kingofshadows]

[gasp]

I knew psychic powers were included in the package demonic deal.

[eyesofaserpent]

Well, they are when I'm at full power. [He chuckles.]

[kingofshadows]

I've been hearing so much about this full power business that I might as well just ask for the full story.