2 ♕ The Hangover [Phone/Action]

[godaime]

[ A - 849 Goldberg Street ]

[ When the sirens began to ring, the only thing Tsunade could do was wake and dash downstairs. There, she encountered her package. Regains from Christmas. She was hesitant to open them during Christmas, given their lack of marking, but, now, without any clue of what would be inside, she decided it would be best if she could open them. Her first one? A picture of a bunch of paperwork from home. ]

What on Ea-[ BOOM

Within the seconds of Tsunade's statement the house seemingly explodes into paper filled chaos. Stacks and stacks of paperwork begin to torrent around the living room, and the living room door bursts wide open, with paper flying out of there by the forests. If you dare to take a look to see what the hell just happened, you'll get a Tsunade who's sitting down with paper up to her shoulders before her pet pig, Tonton, stark naked and without her expensive pearl necklace, pops out of the paper with a fierce oink! ]

[ B - Phone.  ]

Ah, this is probably the worst hangover I ever had. [ Her voice sounds haggard and raspy. She sounds exhausted and weakened by all accounts. ] I can't even remember the last couple of days. What the hell did I drink....? [ She knows what really happened, but, she wants to synthesize as much information as possible and for that, she has to play dumb ] 

[ C - The Post Office ] 

[ With the realization that the paperwork had her entire life story and biography in it with the mysteriously missing parts filled in with her journal that has a day by day summary of her life, Tsunade realized it was time to go to the post office. On the way there, you see a very, veryold lady walking into the office. If you're in there, you know what happens. Tsunade finally made a trade and is, within a blink of an eye, transformed to her younger state.

If you're waiting outside out of curiosity, Tsunade emerges young and not wrinklyas ever. Her loyal pet pig is by her side.  ] 

Ah, Tonton, now that that's out of the way, let's get going. Oink!

[ D - Anywhere! ] 

[ There is a pig following you. Just a random pig. And no matter how much you try to shake it off, it just won't leave you alone. It'll continue to follow you down many streets, with its nose slammed into the ground like a police canine unit. Yep. She doesn't speak, she doesn't talk, she doesn't do anything but follow. ]

[ E - Olney's Tavern ]

[ Tsunade, with her trusty pet pig in her purse like Paris Hilton and chihuahuas, sits at the bar, wallet ready and eager. ]  All right, bartender, make some magic for me. This damn town took two weeks away from my memory, and, in return, I'd like to forget whatever the hell I've been doing from now until the 27th. One Long Island Iced Tea. By the gallon even, I don't give a damn. 

Comments

[commentboxtroll]

[That goes to show just how amazing my reading comprehension is, okay.

Nope, walking faster, faster! And! Actually, this is too much effort to avoid a little pig, so he stops at the corner and turns to look down at Tonton.]

What?

[godaime]

[ I typed chicken as kitchen for like half a damn log so it's all good.

Anyways ignore the default icon, that's just to show that somewhere two blocks away Tsunade is clutching her massive breasts and needs medical attention before she passes out in the middle of the street. Why the fuck is this pig so jumpy anyways?!

Tonton halts and begins to sniff Caesar's shoe with a fairly determined snort. She doesn't sound too pleased either. ]

Oink!

[commentboxtroll]

[Chicken in the kitchen chicken in the kitchen-- oh, this must be a Timmy-in-the-Well thing. As if Tsunade can even fit down a well with that chest.

Caesar tries to gently nudge the snuffling snout away with his boot.]

I don't speak pig.

[godaime]

[ Tonton continues to sniff, but evades his kick and glares at him when he he tries to nudge her off. ] Oink!

[ But, this is all stopped when a very familiar voice can be heard across the street. ] God damn it, Tonton! How many times are you going to get lost today? [ If Caesar will look in Tsunade's direction, he'll definitely see that she looks exhausted...and sixty years younger! And less wrinkly! And much much more beautiful! ]

[commentboxtroll]

[Pigs can... evade? Ugh, it's still snuffling at him though.]

They can't possibly smell that interes... ting... [He's looking up at the sound of the voice. It is familiar! But that person, she isn't! Well, maybe if he squints, which he does.] Tsunade?

[godaime]

[ Tsunade has probably trained the pig in evasion since it is a medical ni-HAHAHA. No. Tonton has avoided many affects from Tsunade's attacks before. The pig has gone to war, okay?

Tsunade begins to dash across the street, ignoring the speeding car until the last possible moment, which she stops with a strong kick to the hood before rushing onwards.

She stops running once she finally crossed the street. She's panting heavily. Now she just casually strolls towards Caesar nodding and having a small smile. ]

Yeah. It's me. And this... [ gasp gasp. ] is Tonton, my pet pig from home. We were separated awhile ago, and this has been happening all day. [ She continues to breathe heavily as she waits for Caesar's BUT YOU WERE OLD remark which seems to be a common occurrence today! ]

[commentboxtroll]

[HE TOTALLY HAD A REMARK LIKE THAT BUT THEN SHE STOPPED A SPEEDING CAR WITH A KICK.

So excuse him while he stares at the car in surprise instead. You'd think he'd be used to seeing stuff like that by now, but no, no, not really.]

[godaime]

[ The car's front bumper is dented and the hood is puffed a bit up with smoke rising out of it. ]

What's the matter? Can't handle how beautiful I look? [ ....oh. Tsunade. You are so shameless. ]

[commentboxtroll]

Marveling at what a brute you are, actually.

[Okay, now he'll look at Tsunade! Her change gains absolutely no change in expression whatsoever. He knows what you really look like, Tsunade, don'e expect any compliments from him.]

[godaime]

Hm? Are you kidding me? That isn't even a tenth of my real strength. Thanks to excellent muscle control I was able to ensure the driver isn't injured. [ Kanyeshrugging forever. B) ]

[commentboxtroll]

And when you have that, you'll still be a brute. [At least brute is bad than hag.] So, you aren't wrinkly anymore. Good for you.

[godaime]

Hey, hey! I'm nowhere near a savage! [ ....And now she'll just get more enraged! ] Don't remind me. It's not like I'm wrinkly for another reason! [ Like using a technique that eats up her life span... ]

[commentboxtroll]

[And he'll remain unworried by this.]

I never said savage.

[godaime]

Isn't that what the word normally means?

[commentboxtroll]

No, not this time. The definition depends on how it's used.

[nitpicking, nitpicking, he isn't going to admit he might be wrong.]

[godaime]

Hm, well I suppose our worlds all have their colloquialisms.

[ Regardless of its accuracy, she's buying it. ]

[commentboxtroll]

[And he'll drop that subject immediately.]

So no slug, huh?

[godaime]

Sadly not, but she'll have to come around eventually. They just can't just keep her forever. [ She seems optimistic about this. ]