9th Fifth - Warm Weather Brings Out The Best In Us

[hisnameisthecaptain]

[Guess what Mayfield? The Captain is drunk, he's had a great morning, and he's naked!

That's right. The alcoholic super hero has gone a bit over board. But still! It gets better!

He may even end up in your house! That's right! Your house!

He's super powered and super naked. You can catch him doing one of the following.]

A)
[He's outside picking a fight with your car/tree/mailbox/dog.

It's a heated argument, he seems to be losing. He is swinging a mostly empty bottle of liquor around.

There's a lot of shouting, but it hasn't gotten violent. Yet.]

B)
[In your kitchen, rummaging around for alcohol or food. He's made a mess of things too.

Your fridge is open, your meats are cooking on the stove with OJ marinade and your milk is spilled all over the floor.]

C)
[In your bathroom, passed out in your shower.

The shower curtain has been torn town and the water is still running on him.

Wait, is that your toothbrush sticking out of his mouth?]

D)
[In your bed. Yes, your bed!

Maybe sprawled out on top of you, or maybe having a naked cuddle. Is he big spoon or small spoon?]

E)
[You got lucky, he never made it inside and he didn't destroy your yard.

Instead he passed out on your lawn, on your driveway or even on your car.]

Comments

[acuity]

[ empoleon just waves her flippers awkwardly placatingly. you're not a pokemon and she doesn't know if she should fight you?!

meanwhile Platina will just be hurrying down to the door to confront the captain and why are you yelling at my penguin bff!! ]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

[Hopefully, she doesn't come outside to see the naked man yelling.]

You heard me! Go back to your home!

[Waving his arms as if to scare the thing off.]

[acuity]

Mr. Captain, please sto--

[ aaaand i am 12 and what is this nudity. SO NOT CLASSY. ]

P-please put on some clothes!... And stop bothering empoleon!

[hisnameisthecaptain]

Tell it to go home and...

☠☠☠☠, where are my pants?

[acuity]

She is home--she's part of my team! And... as for your pants, I... wouldn't know...

[hisnameisthecaptain]

Penguins are pets...

Or super heroes.

Or sports stars.

[Because he is trying to think of what things have teams.

Also, Captain, this is a child, cover up!

He isn't, of course.]

[acuity]

None of those, actually. But, more importantly, can you... just...

[ taking off her scarf and coat, not that it's anywhere big enough for you to fit BUT I HAVE TO TRY!! ]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

[At first confused, then it finally sinks in.]

Oh, ☠☠☠☠!

[He's going to tie it around his waist so it at least covers his front.]

Okay... yeah, I better, uh, go.

And as for you...

[Pointing at the penguin.]

When I find that zoo, you're going the ☠☠☠☠ home.

[acuity]

I'd rather you not! She's with me, understand?

[ OKAY slightly clothed makes her regain a bit of composure. ]

Please take care of yourself, but leave empoleon alone.

[hisnameisthecaptain]

You don't keep zoo animals.

[The more you know.

And The Captain, wobbly, starts to fly.]

[acuity]

She's not a...

[ whoa okay. stepping back a little but still worried! friends don't let friends fly drunk?! ]

Be careful!

[hisnameisthecaptain]

[Friends don't let friends hang out with The Captain.]

I know what I am doing.

[With that he starts to fly off, hits a few branches of the tree, breaks them, falls with them. Laying under them in her yard still.]

[acuity]

[ wow I can't read. ANYWAY she kinda just watched helplessly, then starts forward to start to help him up. ]

I don't think you do, actually. Come inside, you need help!

[hisnameisthecaptain]

[He'll take her help standing up, but then brushes himself off.]

Thanks, but no thanks. I'll try walking it.

[acuity]

It'd be irresponsible to try to do that. And, in addition, I could probably see if I could let you borrow some of my drone father's clothes.

[ i mean it's not like he'd miss it 8| ]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

...

Okay, sure, so long as there are clothes.

[acuity]

There are, so come on.

[ leading the way back to the door. whew! ]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

[Not his proudest moment.

Not his least proudest either.]

[acuity]

[ oookay she leads the way to dronedad's room and closet! luckily it's not time for him to be back from work yet SO HELP YOURSELF 8D ]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

[He awkwardly waits for her to leave before harvesting the clothes and getting himself shabbily clothed.]

[acuity]

[ juuust going to wait in the kitchen searching for aspirin or something after making sure empoleon's out of the way in the living room or someplace so the captain wouldn't try to pick a fight again! ]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

[Stops by the kitchen, wearing pants one size too small and a shirt that is buttoned up wrong.]

Hey, got some whiskey or something?

[acuity]

[ WELL AT LEAST IT'S SOMETHING... ]

I wouldn't know. But more importantly, I don't think you need any more of that!

[hisnameisthecaptain]

Who is the adult here?

[Such a bad example of an adult Captain. The better question is, who is more responsible here?]

Though, if you don't know, I guess I can wait until I get home.

[acuity]

[ ME PICK ME 8| ]

I would advise against that, too! But... since you're dressed, do you think you could get home safely now?