mayfield_rpg | POISON JOKE - WARNING: NAKED CADE!

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POISON JOKE - WARNING: NAKED CADE!

((WARNING: At some point during a thread here, Cade will touch the poison joke flower. It will make all of the clothes Cade is wearing or puts on turn invisible, though only to the eyes of all adult characters other than Cade! So, while Cade, children, drones, etc. will all see him as normal, any adult character will see him as naked.))

A. The Flower Shop
[Cade has returned to the flower shop with a box of delicious pastries to try and make amends for his behavior the other day. While he is there, he will spot a strange blue flower that somehow managed to get into one of the bouquets...]

B. John Doe Park
[Cade is now under the curse of the poison joke, but completely unaware of it, walking about apparently naked to the eyes of all adult characters. He decides that since he is not getting to do much adventuring here in Mayfield, he better keep in shape! So, Cade heads over to the park to do some stretches and warmups first. He can be seen doing standing hamstring stretches, hip adductor stretches, jumping jacks, etc.

C. Around Mayfield
[Cade, still oblivious to the Poison Joke, can be seen jogging around town, really working up a sweat. He may smile and wave at you as he goes by.]

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"UNDEAD? That is even WORSE than a demon!"

[Cade stops and thinks for a second.]

"Oh wait, no its not. Well I guess it depends. I'm going to rank it about the same, is that ok with you?"

Edited 2012-04-22 21:30 (UTC)

[Seriously are we getting into semantics now? Not what Hajime was expecting.]

I'm not one of the reanimated corpses you're likely thinking of. I'm probably much worse.

"Hah! We shall see! Take THIS!"

[Cade runs forward and slashes at you with his (currently invisible) rapier, Frostbrand. Unfortunately, the postman took away all memory of how to properly use it when he gave the sword to Cade, so Cade is slashing it about like an idiot. No training, but an enchanted invisible blade? Plus he's naked, that has to be a bit disconcerting when on the defense. It all comes down to luck.]

((For reference: Frostbrand: Cade’s most potent magic item, the rapier Frostbrand, belonged to his mentor, Leon. The sword is of superior weight, balance, and craftsmanship, and its enchanted edge allows it to cut through other materials as if they were half as thick and half as strong. The blue sapphire at the base of its blade has powerful winter enchantments that give the sword its most powerful properties: its cold blade can inflict frostbite on enemies and instantly extinguishes any flame it is plunged into. Anyone who carries the sword cannot be burned by fire, and once per hour it can be commanded to extinguish all flames within 30 feet.))

Edited 2012-04-22 21:41 (UTC)

[Hajime can't see the blade Cade is wildly flailing around; he's assuming the human is just delusional...

...and then suddenly, ouch. Where did that hit come from? The blade somehow managed to connect with Hajime's upper left thigh, and not only is he bleeding (and it's green), but his leg is feeling weirdly cold. Too cold. He wants to get somewhere warm now...

And with the realization that they're playing that way, reflex kicks in. Hajime's taking a swing at Cade's head with his own arm blade. Looks like he's trying to strike with the flat of the blade, at least.]

[Cade takes a hard smack to the head and goes down. As he hits the ground, he briefly loses grip on the rapier, and suddenly, you see it!
-Until Cade scrambles over and grabs the sword again, causing it to instantly vanish. He rolls back onto his feet and assumes the basic defensive stance his friend recently re-taught him.
You may note that as he stands, none of the dirt and such from the ground seems to stick to him. At all.]

"HAH, is that all you've got?"

Edited 2012-04-22 22:05 (UTC)

[...well, THAT'S new. Hajime's limping slightly now as he's warily circling Cade. He's not quite sure what was up with the sword appearing there on the ground, and he's mentally kicking himself for falling for that invisibility gambit. He's keeping a better eye on Cade's stance and that sword hand now...and wondering why Cade looks so clean after rolling around on the ground in his birthday suit like that.]

Hardly.

[Actually, yeah, because while he's stuck in this form, he's without most of the powers that come with it. Hajime will try to attack again, although his footwork is noticeably slower than what it once was and he's dripping green everywhere. He's aiming for Cade's sword hand this time, once again only trying to strike with the flat of his blade. Cade, have you noticed the monster here is only trying for nonlethal attacks?]

[Cade is far too excited about having a real monster to fight again (just like old times) to notice that it is going easy on him.

The invisible bell-guard of Cade's rapier protects his hand, though you clearly hear the "TINK" against its invisible metal. Cade slashes at you again, twice. The slashes are wild and very, very 'telegraphed', so you have a good chance of getting out of the way this time, invisible sword or not.

(Perhaps if you remember your first meeting, you may remember how quick naive Cade is to take someone at their word. Maybe if you just told him that your were Hah-Jee-Mee...)]]

Edited 2012-04-22 22:27 (UTC)

[Okay, this is...not working. Perhaps if he wasn't fighting without any other powers...Hajime changes tactics. He could run, which would probably result in a naked invisible sword-wielding nut job chasing him back to what remains of his mostly-exploded house.

He's not above a little bit of acting to get out of a rather spotty situation (like he just did this morning with his not!wife), and, remembering the melodramatic way Cade was acting when he first encountered the guy, he will suddenly cry out as though in pain, grab his head with both hands, and fall over. Because he's going to try to pretend like he's under a terrible curse, and maybe with a little luck, use that story to get Cade out of the park and into some pants.]

[Cade points his invisible sword at you in a triumphant post.]

"HA! Now you know better than to, uh, uh... what's going on here?"

[And Hajime will sit up and slowly get to his feet because he really, really doesn't want to be looking at Cade from the angle he was at on the ground. He's still holding his head.]

Ah, Cade...you remember me, right? Hajime? The guy you met not long after you'd arrived? I'm afraid I'm under a terrible curse.

[There, right to the point, and hopefully he's put it in terms Cade can understand. He views his natural form as enough of a curse, anyway. He's pretty sure Cade's going to believe him; after all, all he had to do was just say he wasn't some sort of cultist before Cade stood down that time. This is good, because his leg still feels uncomfortably cold. The bleeding and sword wound itself isn't bothering him as much; he's had worse.]

[Cade's eyes go wide.]

"A curse? Oh no! Waiiiit. Tell me something only Hahjeemee would know."

[Cade is only slightly less trusting because you look like, well that. It doesn't really occur to Cade that he doesn't know Hajime well enough to know anything that only Hajime would know, but, whatever.]

Hajime. My name is pronounced Hajime.

[And hey, looks like Cade's not quite as dumb as Hajime thought...but he hasn't failed to pick up on the fact that Cade might not necessarily know if he were telling the truth about a great many things. He'll play it straight for the moment.]

When you first encountered me, you were under the impression that I was some sort of cultist.

[Cade looks surprised]

"Hahjeemay! It is you!
Oh crap, sorry about slicing your leg open..."

[Hajime dismissively looks down at the wound on his leg, which is still dripping green onto the grass. The cut itself doesn't really bother him, but that leg still feels somewhat cold.]

I've had worse...and it wasn't like you could have known, anyway.

...I'm just more concerned about the strange cold feeling that came with that cut.

[Cade looks a bit sheepish.]

"Sorry about that. Frostbrand was originally forged for the Fey Lord of Winter and absorbed a good deal of his power. It tends to freeze up flesh and blood. Which is great when you use it on an enemy...

I'd pour some luke warm water over that, if I were you..."

Edited 2012-04-23 03:04 (UTC)

[This day's just getting better and better...]

I don't suppose you'd happen to have any of that handy, would you?

[He pauses.]

And I'd put on some pants if I were you. I was under the impression humans generally didn't react favorably to public nudity.

[He's certainly not reacting favorably to it, anyway.]

[Cade looks at him confused.]
"Why do you keep going on about my pants? I'm wearing pants! Are you sure that curse isn't messing with you?"

Edited 2012-04-23 04:33 (UTC)

[There's really no way of getting through to Cade that he's in the nude, is there? And given the way that sword did its whole vanishing and reappearing thing, Hajime's not at all sure what's going on with him.]

Uh, yeah, about that curse...

[He's limping back over to the trees now, where he'll use his wrist blade to cut a rather leafy branch off of one.]

Here, hold this in front of yourself. It's...

[He quickly checks to see what kind of tree it is. He's just making this up as he goes...]

...oak. That'll stop you from catching the curse in the event any of my blood got on you. You need to hold it in front of yourself like this.

[And oddly enough, warding off this curse involves holding a freshly-cut tree branch in front of oneself, as though to cover one's modesty. ~~Perhaps Hajime acquired the curse after streaking in front of a very modest old Gypsy woman.~~]

[Oh boy Hajime, you are such a pal! Cade happily complies and it seems to work.]

"Well thanks, Hahjeemay! You're a real pal! Is there anything I can do to help you with your curse? I'm willing to stick by you through thick and thin until we figure this out!"

[Okay, Cade is at least partially covered now. Close enough. Hajime shakes his head.]

You could say I've been looking for a cure for a while. I'm not sure there is one except time. I'll probably just have to head back home and try to contain myself in the basement once again until I've got myself under control again.

[Now Hajime tries to leave--with the "this is the best I can do" tree branch in place and his leg starting to throb, he's about ready to leave Cade to his own devices. Being that he is a firm subscriber to the "Just Walk it Off" school of wound care and is used to healing at Undead speeds when in this form, he's thrown by the fact that much of this transformation has been cosmetic. Sure, he still has Joker's thick hide and green blood, but that's about it. As he tries to walk away, his wounded leg buckles under him, and he can't help but let out a monster growl of pain. He picks himself up rather quickly, at least. Showing weakness of any sort is not his favorite thing ever.]

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