mayfield_rpg | POISON JOKE - WARNING: NAKED CADE!

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POISON JOKE - WARNING: NAKED CADE!

((WARNING: At some point during a thread here, Cade will touch the poison joke flower. It will make all of the clothes Cade is wearing or puts on turn invisible, though only to the eyes of all adult characters other than Cade! So, while Cade, children, drones, etc. will all see him as normal, any adult character will see him as naked.))

A. The Flower Shop
[Cade has returned to the flower shop with a box of delicious pastries to try and make amends for his behavior the other day. While he is there, he will spot a strange blue flower that somehow managed to get into one of the bouquets...]

B. John Doe Park
[Cade is now under the curse of the poison joke, but completely unaware of it, walking about apparently naked to the eyes of all adult characters. He decides that since he is not getting to do much adventuring here in Mayfield, he better keep in shape! So, Cade heads over to the park to do some stretches and warmups first. He can be seen doing standing hamstring stretches, hip adductor stretches, jumping jacks, etc.

C. Around Mayfield
[Cade, still oblivious to the Poison Joke, can be seen jogging around town, really working up a sweat. He may smile and wave at you as he goes by.]

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[So Hajime's still been skulking around the park with his Undead self, trying to avoid people as he keeps to the cover of some trees...

...and there is a naked human out there doing all sorts of exercises that probably shouldn't be performed while naked out in the park. He figures he's hidden enough ~~and that Cade is oblivious enough~~ not to be seen, so he's secure in offering a bit of advice yelled out from cover of the trees.

Because, really. There are kids present, man.]

PUT SOME PANTS ON!

[Cade looks about. Where did that voice come from? And is there someone around here not wearing pants (hopefully,an attractive woman)?]

"Who? Wha?"

Edited 2012-04-22 19:45 (UTC)

[She spots him the moment he comes through the door and has to resist the urge to hide. Briggs Bears don't hide from people, they fight! Instead she throws up her walls and gives him an icy stare.]

You will be paying today, right?

[Still sticking to the cover of the trees, Hajime tries again. Clearly, Cade requires more than just a random yell from the woods. He remembers Cade's name from that time they met in town, at least. It'll be helpful. Hajime's Undead monster self is not hidden quite as well now; he tried moving to hide himself better but somewhat failed his stealth check. Cade may see some freaky antennae or a large green blade sticking out from behind a tree at an odd angle.]

YOU. CADE MASTERS. PUT SOME PANTS ON.

[Cade gives a very happy smile upon seeing Olivier]

"Of course I am. In more way than one, too!"

[Cade produces a box from the bakery. It has an assortment of goodies in it, ranging from donuts, pastries, and coffee cake, to less sweet things like bagels and muffins, in case Olivier doesn't have a sweet tooth.]

"A peace offering; I'm sorry for my behavior when we met. My first day here may have overwhelmed me a bit."

[Cade is trying to give you the most charming look he can.]

Edited 2012-04-22 20:23 (UTC)

[Cade points at himself as if to say "me?" He looks down, sees that he is indeed wearing pants, then looks around again, spotting a funny antennae sticking out from behind a tree.]

"Ha ha... is someone playing a joke on me?"

Edited 2012-04-22 20:15 (UTC)

[Hajime is still unaware that he's sticking out so badly from behind the tree. He shifts his weight a bit, and they move. He's not entirely sure why Cade is remaining so willfully ignorant of his complete and total lack of pants.]

THIS IS NOT A JOKE. YOU HAVE NO PANTS.

[As he yells, Hajime moves a bit more, and Cade, you might have gotten a better glimpse of a monster over in those trees. Turns out what's attached to those antennae isn't exactly whimsical.]

[Cade's eye widen when he sees the creature. He makes a motion as if having drawn his sword, but you don't see anything in his hand.]

"A demon? Your tricks will not work me, spawn of the abyss! Stop trying to confuse me and show yourself!"

Edited 2012-04-22 20:38 (UTC)

[Olivier is not easily bribed with food, she stares at the box of pastries. Okay, maybe she is since she doesn't enjoy cooking. She nods and moves the arrangement she'd been working on away from her and the box closer, so that she can inspect it.]

[After a brief moment, she decides on a bagel, no use letting him know she has a bit of a sweet tooth.]

Well, I did knock out the man of the house and tie him up for questioning when I first got here.

[There is a naked human waving around a non-existent sword at him. Generally, Hajime's sense of humor is pretty dormant, but in this case, well, Cade now has a monster chuckling at him as he emerges from his hiding spot. Hajime figures that perhaps Cade just needs to be run out of the park and home to a mirror before he'll realize he's naked. Because, seriously, eventually the Mayfield police are going to swing by with some indecency charges and Cade's going to find himself droned. Hajime's trying to do him a favor.]

You should probably go home before you hurt yourself.

[. . . well that's probably illegal. He doesn't really want to both the guy - he gave Keith such a friendly wave, after all! But there were citizens to think about.]

Sorry, excuse me! Pardon me, could you stop?

[Cade chuckles.]

"Oh, that sounds like a very interesting morning."

[Cade smiles at you a bit dumbly for moment. He decides he better say something to fill the awkward silence.]

"So, it looks like you've got some interesting new flowers in here..."

[Cade absent-mindedly turns a blue flower in a nearby face around to get a better look at it. That's strange, you don't recall ever seeing that particular type of flower in your store before...]

((The 'joke' doesn't immediately take effect, I figured it'd be better for Cade's clothes to slowly start to fade out of sight while he flirts with Olivier.))

[Cade makes a "threatening" gesture with his invisible sword.]
"Is that a threat, demon?"

Edited 2012-04-22 21:15 (UTC)

[Cade turns around and comes jogging back. He stands before you, hands on his hips.]

"Well hello there, good sir! What can I do for you?"

Edited 2012-04-22 21:17 (UTC)

[Any threat that gesture may have once held is completely offset by Cade's nakedness. Besides, Hajime doesn't threaten easily anyway, particularly when he's in his Joker form.]

Yeah, sure. It's a threat. The Joker Undead is telling you to get your naked human self out of this park. Or else.

[He's now holding his own wrist-mounted blade up in a guard position, just because it seemed like the thing to do.]

"UNDEAD? That is even WORSE than a demon!"

[Cade stops and thinks for a second.]

"Oh wait, no its not. Well I guess it depends. I'm going to rank it about the same, is that ok with you?"

Edited 2012-04-22 21:30 (UTC)

[Seriously are we getting into semantics now? Not what Hajime was expecting.]

I'm not one of the reanimated corpses you're likely thinking of. I'm probably much worse.

"Hah! We shall see! Take THIS!"

[Cade runs forward and slashes at you with his (currently invisible) rapier, Frostbrand. Unfortunately, the postman took away all memory of how to properly use it when he gave the sword to Cade, so Cade is slashing it about like an idiot. No training, but an enchanted invisible blade? Plus he's naked, that has to be a bit disconcerting when on the defense. It all comes down to luck.]

((For reference: Frostbrand: Cade’s most potent magic item, the rapier Frostbrand, belonged to his mentor, Leon. The sword is of superior weight, balance, and craftsmanship, and its enchanted edge allows it to cut through other materials as if they were half as thick and half as strong. The blue sapphire at the base of its blade has powerful winter enchantments that give the sword its most powerful properties: its cold blade can inflict frostbite on enemies and instantly extinguishes any flame it is plunged into. Anyone who carries the sword cannot be burned by fire, and once per hour it can be commanded to extinguish all flames within 30 feet.))

Edited 2012-04-22 21:41 (UTC)

[Hajime can't see the blade Cade is wildly flailing around; he's assuming the human is just delusional...

...and then suddenly, ouch. Where did that hit come from? The blade somehow managed to connect with Hajime's upper left thigh, and not only is he bleeding (and it's green), but his leg is feeling weirdly cold. Too cold. He wants to get somewhere warm now...

And with the realization that they're playing that way, reflex kicks in. Hajime's taking a swing at Cade's head with his own arm blade. Looks like he's trying to strike with the flat of the blade, at least.]

[There was a young man practicing soccer in the park, but has no stopped to stare in confusion for a split second before he turns his face away, bright red. He'll focus his attention on kicking that soccer ball. Yes. Until said ball goes out of his control and rolls Cade's way. CRUD.]

[Cade takes a hard smack to the head and goes down. As he hits the ground, he briefly loses grip on the rapier, and suddenly, you see it!
-Until Cade scrambles over and grabs the sword again, causing it to instantly vanish. He rolls back onto his feet and assumes the basic defensive stance his friend recently re-taught him.
You may note that as he stands, none of the dirt and such from the ground seems to stick to him. At all.]

"HAH, is that all you've got?"

Edited 2012-04-22 22:05 (UTC)

[Cade sees the ball and merrily picks it up to bring it back to you. He jaunts over with quite the bouncing spring in his step.]

"Here you go! Did you lose this? Few things worse than a loose ball!"

[Crowe is trying to be polite yet not make direct contact looking at Cade, face still bright red.]

U-Um, thank you, sorry a-about that. Loook, sir, I... While I feel that people should b-be able to dress how they like, there, um... There's children around and all...

[Cade looks at you, obviously puzzled.]

What are you talking about, sir?

[...well, THAT'S new. Hajime's limping slightly now as he's warily circling Cade. He's not quite sure what was up with the sword appearing there on the ground, and he's mentally kicking himself for falling for that invisibility gambit. He's keeping a better eye on Cade's stance and that sword hand now...and wondering why Cade looks so clean after rolling around on the ground in his birthday suit like that.]

Hardly.

[Actually, yeah, because while he's stuck in this form, he's without most of the powers that come with it. Hajime will try to attack again, although his footwork is noticeably slower than what it once was and he's dripping green everywhere. He's aiming for Cade's sword hand this time, once again only trying to strike with the flat of his blade. Cade, have you noticed the monster here is only trying for nonlethal attacks?]

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