Ruri's Prank Logs

[hontobakabaka]

[Ruri received her letter early on the first and and decided that this seemed harmless enough so she would do this one. But she also decided to hit one person not on her list]

Action A (The home of Wes Jansen)

[He wasn't on the list, but he seemed to be a pro, and she knew a little about his world. She set it so the second he walked into a bathroom, any bathroom, Omoikane would trap him in a holographic cube of that tree village from the 3rd movie with the teddy bear things, just as the final song was going to play, right after the blaring of the horns they would all break into a rendition of "Never Gunna Give You Up" and the accompanying dance number. After setting the program to go she walked to close confines.]

Action B (The Home of Poland)

[First she had a phone call made to Poland's home in an old heavily German accent "I am da Viper. I clean all impurities first. I vill come for you from the west." At the end of the day she left another call in the same German reading "Top floor first, I leave nothing to chance. Ve vill meet soon." Early the morning of the second, just before sunrise she makes one more call in the old German man's voice. "The viper demands swift payment for da viper's work. It will be crystal clear when I come." Shortly after 10pm there is one last call. "The viper comes tomorrow at the end of the day. Da viper will clean like in the old days."]

Action C (Home of Sazh)

[Ruri set up something similar to Wes for this man, she didn't know him, but she had it programmed so that whenever Omoikane scanned him sitting down on a toilet a holographic field would cover him and it would look like he was in the center of the United Earth Council room on the toilet in the middle of a meeting and programmed everyone to stare and look uncomfortable.]

Action D (around town, SPECIFICALLY around Makoto Nanaya)

[Ruri didn't want to overuse the holograms, and the com system could just play soft music, so she set it so that whenever Makoto was alone, it would softly play recorded songs from one of the Spanish stations her crew had requested years ago. She had close to 2 years of broadcasts so there was plenty of insane gibberish to go around.]

Comments

A

[kettchmeifyoucan]

[Wes was not expecting to find Ewoks when he went to take a shower. Which was of course the perfect time to make someone find Ewoks. And while he does not know the specific significance of the song, it was a nice touch. He starts laughing.]

Oh, this is good.

[hontobakabaka]

[The song and dance routine continued for a minute before Ruri's face appeared on a separate screen in her usual deadpan]

April fools. The town is pitting us against each other in a gag war so I figured I'd warm up trying to gag a professional joker.

[kettchmeifyoucan]

I'm impressed. It's been completely Amateur Hour so far.

[hontobakabaka]

Well, it may be due to bad resources, or the fact that it takes a certain art that many may not have.

[kettchmeifyoucan]

Lack of artistry seems to be the main obstacle. There's plenty to work with here with a bit of creativity.

[He pulls a card out of his pocket and starts scribbling]

[hontobakabaka]

Well, not everyone enjoys a small laugh, some people here have more twisted world views.

[kettchmeifyoucan]

Not being able to enjoy this sort of thing is a bad sign, in my experience. Usually means something is wrong.

D

[underboobs]

[At first, Makoto was definitely chalking this up to someone nearby playing some music. Something that totally wouldn't be out of the ordinary, right? But that started to obviously not be the case, and it was definitely starting to kind of be weird.]

... What the? [WHY IS THERE A FOREIGN LANGUAGE FOLLOWING HER.]

[hontobakabaka]

[Ruri walks up behind the other woman as the music stops]

What the what Miss?

[underboobs]

[Whoever this girl is, it doesn't matter. What matters is that the music suddenly stopped.]

Didn't you hear that?

[hontobakabaka]

Hear what?

[underboobs]

[Oh no, this isn't happening.]

Talking and music! It was really loud!

[hontobakabaka]

I hear you and you are kind of loud. Does that count?

C.

[birdinfro]

[Sometimes you need to make homage to the porcelain god. That is a thing that happens when you're human. But, he's got his newspaper for bathroom reading and it's all good. However, the second Sazh drops his pants and sits down..He is completely and utterly taken entirely by surprise at the change of scenery. Oh... This is...Hm. Sazh waves awkwardly to the crowd. What else can you do when you're holding a newspaper, you've dropped your trousers and boxers, you're sitting on a toilet and a ton of people are staring at you uncomfortably? That and he needs to think about how to approach this...]

Could...You all look away for a minute or something? I'm afraid I'm a little underdressed for whatever this is.

[Well, one thing is for certain. He doesn't have to go anymore.]

[hontobakabaka]

[One of the uniformed persons looks at Sazh]

Sir, this is the speaking podium of the United Earth Government. Is it APPROPRIATE to come dressed like this and... WITH YOUR OWN TOILET?!

[birdinfro]

Uh.. Well. This isn't someplace I expected to be. Must've missed the invitation. Is this even Mayfield? [It would be his luck to move on to another world while on the toilet, wouldn't it?]

[hontobakabaka]

Mayfield? Sir, this isn't some bad television town. This is the Earth De fence Force Headquarters in Geneva! Now I say, what gave you the idea of bringing THAT here and interrupting the meeting?!

[birdinfro]

[Who where whatsit? Yep. Another world. ] Um.. Let me..Fix myself and I'll be on my merry way.. [Slowly gets off of the toilet, trying to use the newspaper to maintain decency and fiddling with his pants one-handed...Only for the scenery to change back into his bathroom the second he is fully off the toilet.]

What in the..?

[hontobakabaka]

[The sink drips slightly as the bathroom.... Is the bathroom.]

B

[likesottlyfab]

[Poland didn't want to admit it, but the phone calls from "Da Viper" were something he found a little concerning. There was something about hearing the words "clean all impurities" and "like in the old days" from an ominous voice with a German accent that just left Poland feeling... ill.

By the end of the fourth message, Poland had finally had enough of it.]

L-look who ever this is, that's totally not funny so cut it out! I mean it!

[He had a feeling that the person on the other end of the line hadn't bothered to listen to him, however.] ... Hello?

[Needless to say, Poland didn't sleep well that night. Feelings Poland didn't want to remember had resurfaced and kept him from sleeping, eating away at him in the darkness. By the time the sun rose the next morning in Mayfield, Poland was still awake.

Poland went through the motions of his day; making breakfast, attempting a chore or two, going to work, figuring that keeping busy would keep him too occupied to think about "Da Viper" and his veiled threats. It seemed to be working!

As the day drifted away however, the words festered quietly in the back of Poland's mind...

"The viper comes tomorrow at the end of the day. Da viper will clean like in the old days."]

[hontobakabaka]

[It was half an hour before sunset, the day was nearing its end, so Ruri came to the house with a small box and knocked on the door.]

[likesottlyfab]

[Poland normally let Mr. Pony or Miku answer the door for him, but Mr. Pony was out in the backyard running around and Miku wasn't anywhere in sight.

Opening it a slight crack, he'll peek out.]

Hello?

[hontobakabaka]

Hello. I'm from a block or so away and I made too many cookies. I just thought I'd offer them to homes that looked like they had people in them.

[likesottlyfab]

Oh um... [She wasn't a creepy german man, but she was still someone he didn't know so it still made him a little anxious... but she seemed nice. Plus she had cookies. He'll open the door a little wider.]

Uh... that's like nice of you.

[hontobakabaka]

[She smiled very slightly and offered a box with cookies in them]

Are you all right? You look like you are expecting something.