second waning gibbous ☾

[werewolfoflondon]

[action - 1485 Kramden]

[Honestly, those sword-fighting "lessons" with Crown had been far less "lessons" and much closer to "beating Remus' face in with a piece of wood." The day following had found him laying very, very still on the couch and rather wishing he were dead. Now, he's simply approaching everything quite gingerly.

Going about his daily life in excruciating pain. My, but this feels familiar. Perhaps he's simply a glutton for punishment.

Reasoning that perhaps it won't be quite so bad if he binds it, Remus has left the bathroom door cracked, and -- shirt abandoned on the floor -- is trying to work out the best method of wrapping ace bandage around all of the bruises on his badly-mottled torso. Most of his ribs and abdomen are an angry purple bruise at this point, but the shirts hide it well.

When he hears the front door, he pokes his head out of the bathroom.]

Lily? Is that you?


[action - library; later]

[Torso properly bound, Remus feels far more confident in his ability to venture out into public. Granted, cycling to the library isn't exactly comfortable, but he contents himself with the knowledge that he'll be able to barricade himself in an armchair with a stack of books when he arrives.

And that is precisely what he does.]

Comments

[werewolfoflondon]

There is no cure.

[Remus seems hesitant, and for a very long moment, only silence stretches on between them. The others would be furious if Remus told her. It's the sort of thing they should, by rights, all do together. And yet, it's Remus' own secret to share or keep as he wishes. And simply having someone else who could understand, with whom he could share a bit of the burden...

That counts for quite a lot.]

There's something in the works, or so I've read. A potion. The Prophet is still vague about it, but it may make the entire thing a bit more bearable, at least.

[bespell]

[Lifting herself off the floor, Lily's first instinct is to comfort, rather than gloat in being right. She settles herself on the couch, resting a hand on Remus's shoulder to draw his attention subtly, a gentle squeeze.]

How did you bear it all this time?

[werewolfoflondon]

[Remus simply offers a smile and a shrug.]

James, Sirius, and Peter. They're a great help, believe it or not. They take care of me. Make sure I'm not a danger to anyone, or myself. It's better help than I got when I was younger.

[bespell]

[She's quieted into a sort of admiration, if not outright respect. It makes sense that friends looks out for each other, especially with in a tight band, but a profound act of selflessness doesn't touch her lightly.]

It may be presumptuous of this, but you're a lucky man.

[werewolfoflondon]

[Remus laughs, though it's really more of a balk than anything else. Lucky. Yes, that's what he is. Luckiest bloke in the world.]

In the sense that I have help, yes. I am.

[bespell]

You have not one, but three dunderheads making it their business to take care of you, after all.

[werewolfoflondon]

You know, I never would have expected it. But believe me, it never fails to escape my notice that I'm lucky to have them. They've gone above and beyond anything I could have hoped for.

...though it's really not my place to go into detail about that. You ask them yourself, they'll probably tell you.

[bespell]

Probably. [But is it really a good idea? Male comradeship was nothing like how she bonded with the other girls.]

I remember Potter and Black making the most elaborate excuses for whenever you weren't up to being out and about.

[werewolfoflondon]

I suppose a good deal of them were more palatable than, "Sorry, he's laid up on account of being a wolf last night."

[bespell]

[Lily's eyes still widen despite herself. She supposes she's not getting used to the notion any time soon, but she dips her head, with a smile.]

There was one time when you were diarrhea and had bolted the loo shut on account of needing the whole area to yourself, and the time when you were out of commission for drinking Pettigrew's rat tunic. On that note, when did he ever keep a rat?

[werewolfoflondon]

Oh... he's--

[Remus catches himself on the cusp of another easy half-truth, and tamps down on the desire to perpetuate the ruse. No. No more lies around Lily. She deserves better than that.]

As I said, that's their business to tell you. But really, they couldn't have come up with something more flattering than that?

[bespell]

I always knew you wouldn't miss class because you shaved your head on a dare, and were too embarrassed to come down before growing it back.

[werewolfoflondon]

Alas, you've proven yourself more clever than James Potter and Sirius Black. [Remus smirks.] As if there were ever a doubt.

[bespell]

Maybe it's because I actually exercise my brain. [Bitter? Not at all!]

[werewolfoflondon]

That's entirely possible. Probable, even.

[Remus sighs.]

...it's nice to have someone else who knows.

[bespell]

Do you think they actually know where the library is? [She rests her head over the head of the couch, musing idly.]

[werewolfoflondon]

I haven't the slightest. Perhaps you should rescue your damsels?

[bespell]

But then where would we be?

Do you feel different, here?

[werewolfoflondon]

I do. I can't say for certain, there's been no full moon yet. But we're nearing it, and I usually start to go downhill the closer it gets. It's kind of a relief, to be honest.

I'm sorry! I missed this tag ><

[bespell]

Does it make you feel like...

A different person, perhaps? Someone else?

[werewolfoflondon]

[Remus has to think on that for a moment. Think long and carefully, as it's certainly something he considered before, though not something he particularly cared to dwell upon.]

...for the longest time, growing up, I thought I'd give anything to be rid of it. Even some darker times, I seriously considered if living was worth the pain I had to endure every month. But despite that, I suppose it became a part of me. Perhaps not the best part, but a part nevertheless.

So I suppose I just feel like something is missing. Though, as to whether I'd have it back? [Remus smirked.] Still not so clear on that part.

[bespell]

[She doesn't notices how her hands ball into fists when Remus brings up ending his life, but her fingers leave tiny nail imprints all the same. It's easier to go with it than be horrified or scared at what he's told her, and it's still too hard to process what he's confessed to.]

All this time I thought you've had an unstable family life. [Lily offers with a small smile.] Little did I know.

[werewolfoflondon]

[Remus shrugs it off with a wistful smile. Oh, if only it were as simple as that. What family life he has is unstable, simply because of his condition. Mother blamed Father for Remus' encounter with Fenrir, Father fell into depression, and the household had never quite been the same since.

He's gotten so sick of long silences.]

Well, you're my family here. [Remus looks away and scrubs a hand through his hair.] ...honestly a better family than I can speak of back home, when it comes down to it.

[bespell]

We all deserve second chances at happiness, don't we? Even if it's with new families. [But Lily's face does go warm at the high compliment. Remus has hardly been unpleasant to her in Mayfield, which is more than she asks for from others.]

[werewolfoflondon]

True enough. [Remus draws a deep breath.]

...they had a cage built in the basement. They didn't have much choice, of course. It wasn't as if either of them could deal with what happened every month. But they put me there in the evening and walked away, and-- just ignored the sounds all night.

[Remus looks incredibly distant when he speaks, staring at the floor. Though in the midst of that, there's a quiet laugh.]

James, Sirius, and Peter. They did more for me than my own parents could. I hope they'll tell you about it some day.