mayfield_rpg | ✖ anxiety attack: 011 ✖ Poison Joke ✖

Entry tags:

✖ anxiety attack: 011 ✖ Poison Joke ✖

[A. 339 Brady Lane; morning]

[She should have known better than to try to move the weird blue flowers that were springing up everywhere, but noooooo...

A very resigned and scruffy-looking pony can be found limping around the house, trying to see how much of the place is overrun with the blue blossoms.

While muttering in annoyance to herself, as usual.]

Oh all the stupid things...a pony? Really? How'm I going to get anything done with hooves? It's not too bad, but still...

[B. John Doe Park; afternoon]

[This dull green pony can be found napping in a sunny patch in the park, her bad leg stretched out as she dozes. She's already been partially traumatized today, so why not strike up a conversation? After all, ponies aren't dragons, so poking a sleeping pony can't be that bad.

Also, even on the flank that isn't horribly scarred, she seems to be missing something important.

Her cutie mark. Mika is still a blank flank.]

[C: Around town: evening]

[As nice as the nap was, Mika never quite realized how far the house was from the park until she has to limp home. The bedraggled pony is making slow progress, but she tends to stop frequently and sit to rest her leg.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Yep. It's like the plant poison oak, only instead of giving you a horrible rash, the plant plays a prank on you. Generally, it's harmless.

[She shrugs, rolling her eyes a little as she eases herself into a sitting position.]

Nah, the screaming thing is...an unfortunate side effect of some of the places I've been. I startle a little too easily sometimes, and I try not to but it's not something I can usually control. My "husband" [somehow she manages to make air quotes at that word, even with hooves] ended up as one too, it's kinda weird.

Well, once you get a little used to it, it's a pretty neat look I think. Kinda insect-like, but still neat.

Harmless. Right.

[He decides not to say anything about how his house pretty much got blown up as a result of various poor household reactions to the Poison Joke's transformations...

He nods as she explains about the screaming.]
Unfortunate, indeed.

...and I do have to wonder why ponies were so common today. At least I got something with thumbs.

[Still looking at you in disbelief as you tell him he looks neat. Because this has not happened, ever.]

Uh...thanks, I guess.

Well...all right, mostly harmless.

[She touches a hoof to her chin as she seems to consider things, her shaggy tail flopping against the grass in a very canine-like manner.]

Hmmm, if I have to hazard a guess it's possibly because the Poison Joke originates from Equestria, the land that the ponies actually come from. It's possible that the plant is pranking people with pony forms because of that, but I'm not a specialist so I can't be sure.

[Again she looks sheepish, ducking her head enough that her face is mostly obscured by her shaggy mane, but not enough to hide the flicker of a small smile.]

No problem. Are you new in town?

That actually makes a lot of sense, though if that's the case, then I have to wonder why it chose to turn me into a creature from my world.

[He shakes his head a bit.]

I've been here about a month. You?

[Mika just shrugs.]

It's different for everyone, probably thought it'd be funny to turn a wolf into a prey animal. [And now Mika's curiosity is piqued.] That form is from your world? What's it like?

Almost a year, actually.

That does sound like the sort of thing it would do...this form is a creature called an Undead. Back home, I battle against them quite a bit.

My world's about fifty years in the future from the time period we're stuck in, but other than the presence of the Undead, it's apparently quite similar to other Earth-type worlds out there.

[Totally leaving out details here and there...he doesn't want to get into that Undead-related awkwardness.]

A year? And here I thought a month was bad.

An undead? I have a distinct feeling that it's nothing like what I'm thinking of.

Mine is as well. Actually, closer to sixty years, really.

No, I've met people who'd been here at least a year when I first arrived. I'm fairly certain that there might be some who've been here longer. I'm not sure when the experiments started up.

[She frowns a little, looking concerned. Then she seems to remember something.]

Oh! I'm Mika, by the way. Mika Whitepaws. If you ever need any help, I could probably tell you who to talk to if I can't help you myself.

Probably not. It's not exactly a reanimated corpse...they're called that because they cannot die.

[He nods thoughtfully when she says she's met people who have been there longer than she has. It's not a reassuring thought.]

I'm Hajime. Hajime Aikawa.

[Another nod. He's got this insane loner thing about asking for help, but he can at least be polite from time to time.]

I'd appreciate that.

Seriously? That's...wow. And you fight those? That must be pretty intense. But I'm pleased to meet you, Hajime.

[She goes quiet as she thinks hard, going over names in her head and how often she's seen people around.]

There's at least two people I can think of. Karkat Vantas, and Dist the Rose. Unless they've had their memories altered, they're two of the people that can explain almost anything in this town. Usually they're the ones who write letters to newcomers, explaining the situation. If there's something you absolutely need to know, they're the ones to talk to. Karkat looks like a young boy, around thirteen years old, and Dist looks like a young man somewhere in his twenties, possibly thirties with pale hair. Best way to find people in this town is to use the phones and ask around, you should be able to find anyone that way.

[She thinks that's about everything, until she stops, pawing at the grass with one hoof as she remembers an important fact.]

Oh! And by the way, don't drink the milk that's delivered to your door. The milkman tends to poison it or put razorblades inside, and that's usually some of the lesser things he does to it. It's better to buy milk at the store.

Mostly, you just beat on them until you've weakened them enough to seal them away again.

[He nods.]

It's nice to meet you, too.

[As he listens to her describe things, he realizes he didn't know most of this and that the information may be very helpful to have later on. Maybe he should try talking to people more often...]

Thanks. About all I knew of that already was not to drink the milk--we found razorblades the first day. Good to know.

That sounds really tedious. What do they do? Go on wild rampages or something?

Yeah, the milkman's kind of a bastard like that. You wouldn't believe the things we found in the milk before, or what we've had to drink. [She can't suppress a shudder at the memory.] Anyway, you were pretty lucky it was just razorblades, though it sounds horrible when I say that. Nobody got too hurt, did they?

Anyway, if you need me, I'll be around town. I usually work at the hospital, and normally I look more human but with wolf ears and a tail. If you need anything just give me a call, and I'll do my best to help.

[He chuckles dryly at her asking if Undead go on wild rampages.]

It's what they're best at...some of the higher-leveled ones are a bit more subtle, but the rest, that's exactly what they do.

[He shakes his head at the discussion of the milk.]

No, no one got hurt, fortunately...though we did have a close call when our newest housemate arrived a couple of weeks ago. I had to tackle him before he could take a drink.

[Nods at the offer of help.]

Thanks. I work at the butcher's, and I'm...well, normally, human. Just ask there if you're looking for me...if you need any monsters beaten, I can do that. Otherwise, I'm pretty much limited to dishing out cuts of meat.

Seriously? It really is like TV, that's kind of ridiculous...

Well, at least you were there to catch it before any real damage could be done, so be thankful for small blessings, I suppose.

The butcher? [She perks up instantly, her tail wagging...which looks really strange on a pony.] I'll definitely have to stop by soon, then. After I get turned back to normal, I mean.

...like TV?

[He shakes his head at the discussion of the milk.]

There weren't any needles or razorblades in the spill, but I'm pretty sure whatever was in there ate through the carpet a bit.

[Wow, a pony wagging its tail does look rather odd. He'll refrain from commenting on that.]

Sure, come by when things are back to normal. I'll fix you up with something nice. On the house, as my apology for startling you so badly.

Sorry, some television shows where I come from have plots that are startlingly similar to what you're talking about. No offense meant.

You know, that wouldn't surprise me at all, sadly.

[Her eyes go positively huge, and perhaps a bit sparkly which is kind of unsettling, but seems to go hand-in-hand (hoof?) with being a pony.]

Really? You mean that?

[You sir have just become one of Mika's new best friends. Or at least her hero. Fresh delicious meat that she doesn't have to pay for this one time? Christmas came early this year!]

None taken. This place does draw from several different realities, after all.

[And wow, he is nowhere near used to making people that happy. It just doesn't happen. Throws him off guard a bit.]

Yeah, I mean that.

Yeah, there's that.

[Her tail is wagging again, and she's positively beaming.]

Thank you!

[So unused to making people that happy. So very unused to it. He'd return that smile with an awkward one of his own were this form to allow that.]

You're quite welcome.

Hopefully this'll be over soon, it'll probably only last a few more days at most.

[Eeee, she's so excited.]

Oh! Hey! [Sudden idea! She stamps both forehooves on the grass before she can catch herself.]

I'll cook you something! I'm not the best but I do know how to cook a decent steak or something, and I can make a decent chili. I'll bring you some of whatever I fix from that cut of meat. How's that sound?

Yeah, I'd prefer not to remain in this form any longer than I have to...

[He has no idea how to deal with this excitement, and he's surprised by the offer. He is so unused to having friends...]

That would be very nice of you. Do you have any preferences as to the cut?

That one does look like it makes things awkward.

[She touches a hoof to her mouth. From the looks of it, it probably makes it hard getting in and out of doorways.]

Not really, any cut of meat is fine with me.

[She would probably eat it raw if no one was looking too, but she knows better than that. After all, she's a mostly civilized wolf.]

At least I'm walking around on two legs. I'd imagine the hooves get cumbersome.

[He looks thoughtful.]

We'll have to see what looks good that day, then.

[And he'd probably not bat an eye at her eating it raw. He's not one to judge.]

Only when one of them doesn't support your weight well.

[She huffs, her tail waving.]

Excellent!

[Looks like she's really looking forward to this, she'll have to think of something good to make. Since she has roommates and cooks for a full house, she doesn't usually eat raw meat. Besides, it always tastes better when it has a chance to soak up the seasonings she puts on it.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

✖ anxiety attack: 011 ✖ Poison Joke ✖

A little! (also sorry for super late tag)

Don't worry about it!

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

Eep, thought I'd tagged this yesterday. Sorry!

Oh no~! It's okay, it happens to the best of us.

Re: Oh no~! It's okay, it happens to the best of us.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

It says something when I don't have any icons that properly show her excitement

Nice. XD

no subject

no subject

no subject