1st Fifth - A Hero's Got To Do What A Hero's Got To Do! [Event]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

[Back Dated to the 16th]


A) [Action: Beulah Street]

[The Captain is trying to cope with the sound.

His method of coping involved emptying his stock of whiskey.

He's wandering around the street, drinking from his last bottle and cursing at anything that agitates him. That dog, that curb he tripped over, the sun for being too bright, or whatever else he can blame for his misery.]


B) [Action: The Dairy]

[That's it. Enough is enough!

He flies at top speed, tearing through the air and driving straight towards The Dairy.

The impact is loud and sounds painful. The Dairy is unscathed as The Captain bounces off and tumbles a distance away. Knocked unconscious by the force of impact.]


C) [Action: Olney's Tavern]

[Eventually, The Captain will wake up and find his way to the one place he can go to drown away his problems.

Walking in, sitting down at the bar and ordering a drink. Not planning to stop until someone forces him out.]

Comments

[1st_superhero]

[Wait...was this bum implying...]

Ah...sorry, but I'm not attracted to you that way.

[Not that he blamed the bum for misinterpreting it. After all, Gilgamesh expects everyone to lust after him.]

I just wanted to take you home so Enkidu can play with you.

[The part about "Garvi" piques his interest.]

Garvi, huh? What's he like?

[hisnameisthecaptain]

Hey, if you're going to get pissy and insulting now, I'm not telling you.

You and your boyfriend can find someone else. I am going to go find someone not crazy to talk to.

[1st_superhero]

[Gilgamesh shrugs. Oh well, the bum will change his mind...eventually. But then it would be a matter of whether or not Gilgamesh would remain interested in taking him home.]

Have fun talking with your bum friends then

[hisnameisthecaptain]

I don't think Mayfield has bums...

... but I guess it has it's share of crazy people. So you'll fit right in buddy.

[1st_superhero]

But you're clearly a bum. How can you say that Mayfield has no bums?

[hisnameisthecaptain]

Did someone hit you in the head or are you just trying to piss me off now?

[1st_superhero]

Well, I do have a headache...so maybe someone hit me in the head?

[hisnameisthecaptain]

Yeah, that'd make sense.

Now go wander off to the hospital before you die or something. I'm not cleaning up your corpse.

[1st_superhero]

Don't worry. I can't die.

[However minor of a god he was, he was still a god and therefore immortal.]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

Yeah, I heard that one before.

People aren't as impossible to kill as they think.

Luckily, this town will bring you back.

[1st_superhero]

Oh, so you mean this place comes with a reset button? That's good to know.

[hisnameisthecaptain]

Kinda. You remember it but you're back again.

Which means anyone you kill comes back too.

So you can't really punish the bad guys.

[1st_superhero]

Oh well, I'll just beat them up whenever I catch them doing anything bad then.

[All stories needed a couple good recurring villains. It wouldn't be fun otherwise.]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

You should probably go find some place to hide. you don't look tough enough for that sort of thing.

[1st_superhero]

Hey! What do you mean 'don't look tough enough?' I'll have you know that Aruru herself designed this body!

[hisnameisthecaptain]

A who what now?

[1st_superhero]

You know, Aruru? Mami? Nihursag? Sumerian fertility goddess? One of the seven greatest gods in Mespotamian mythology?

[And his grandma.]

Just take my word for it that she designs perfect bodies, okay?

[hisnameisthecaptain]

No, she one of those sex gods?

Also... are you a robot?

[1st_superhero]

Not really, no. More like childbirth or plant fertility.

Nope--I'm 2/3 divine and 1/3 mortal.

[Though he's not quite sure of it nowadays. Did becoming a minor god remove his mortal side or not?]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

So, like Thor, but less cool.

[1st_superhero]

...I'm cooler than Thor.

[Honestly, did Thor have mad scientist death rays in his closet?]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

Oh yeah?

Prove it.

[1st_superhero]

How? What do you wanna see?

[He has a whole bunch of tricks that he can show off.]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

How about you fly and strike down an entire building to start?

I mean, Thor could kick some serious ☠☠☠☠.

[1st_superhero]

Sure! Just show me which one.