Karkat Vantas (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
crusthatecean) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
mayfield_rpg2012-06-06 08:15 pm
crusthatecean) wrote in mayfield_rpg2012-06-06 08:15 pm
Entry tags:
♋ 34
[Phone]
I'm getting really tired of these 'change your history and personality' events. I put down a vote that next event be one of those 'tear out your organs while you're awake' events, I think I prefer those. Who is with me?
Also it goes without saying that I was an obnoxious fucking asshole, like pretty much all highbloods, I guess. Feel free to take issue with it, not least because out of all my many flaws, I never thought that would be one of them.
I'm getting really tired of these 'change your history and personality' events. I put down a vote that next event be one of those 'tear out your organs while you're awake' events, I think I prefer those. Who is with me?
Also it goes without saying that I was an obnoxious fucking asshole, like pretty much all highbloods, I guess. Feel free to take issue with it, not least because out of all my many flaws, I never thought that would be one of them.
no subject
This is the shittiest pile to talk on, I can't believe how consistently terrible you are.
[He'll pause for a second, though, because his recent experience of being a love starved indigo makes it a little harder to be casually cruel.]
Whatever, it's fine. Listen, what you're saying is true. You get crazy, I calm you down, that's how this works. But you're wrong to view that as a personal failing on your part. You saw what a mess I was in your hooves.
It's complicated. And an extremely long story you probably know some of, but you should hear it from me. Do you remember that awful night where Terezi was mysteriously killed that I never said fuck all about?
no subject
That one night you done came back with all her blood on you? Yeah, I think so.
no subject
[He'll shift over so he's able to lean against Gamzee while he talks.]
We stole something from Doc Scratch. Or she did, but he said it was my fault for not keeping everyone in line, which fair enough, I knew what she was up to. So he killed her, and then he told me what we were trying to find out just to be a sick shithead.
He told me that what he wanted was for us, us twelve, to win our section. And to do that, he changed our culture. He put the Condesce in charge, and he made it so highbloods ruled over lowbloods, and he also changed us. He made us more violent and dangerous, he made some of us prone to killing others. And when he did that, he made it worse for some. He made it so highbloods especially would be dangerous and highbloods especially would subjugate the lower classes and keep them in line.
He did all of that so we'd grow up strong enough to defeat the Black King, so we'd win and help him, but never get our reward or survive in the end.
[He swallows hard, his tone turning increasingly bitter and disgusted as he speaks.]
I hate him. All that shit, that awful highblood shit that I did this week, that you've done before when you go to that dark place, that's not you. That's him.
Oh, and I just lied. He didn't kill Terezi. He just hurt her enough that I would have to.
no subject
He did motherfuckin' what? [The arm around Karkat tightens and his voice comes out as a snarl; even with his moirail already here calming down, just the idea of Karkat having to be put through that - to have to put his red quadrant down like a beast, makes him shake with fury and horror.]
no subject
[He'll let himself be pulled closer, and he'll push a hand through Gamzee's hair to try and calm him. He's feeling a little shaken himself; this isn't anything he wants to think about, let alone go through again.]
That's why I don't want you or anyone else to have anything to do with him. If you try anything, all he'll do is hurt you, and I'll cut your windtube too because you're my responsibility, but I won't forgive you for making me. Got it?
no subject
Aight, aight. What was all that biznasty 'bout him messin' with our world? I didn't really get any of that shit, sooooorry.
no subject
[He tucks his head underneath Gamzee's chin, able to pull in closer that way; it's a little embarrassing, because this kind of cuddling would be impossible for any other troll who doesn't have humiliating soft nubs where horns are meant to be, but it's also more comfortable than watching out for Gamzee impaling him in the neck.]
He's been alive for longer than our planet has been, and he'd manipulated people and the way our planet works. Don't ask me how he did it, but don't ever think it's something wrong with you. That dark place, that asshole who tries to hurt other trolls, who hurt me, that's something he did to you.
The asshole who likes clowns and horns and stupid bright colors and trusts everyone to the point it must be a form of pan damage and who wants everyone to be his friend, who never even gave the tiniest squirt of a shit what color blood I had, that's you. Don't ever think something different.
no subject
I wanna keep on being that motherfucker. But...I dunno if I can be all up with the sopor consumption that much longer.
no subject
[He peers up and reaches to rub his cheek just a little.]
You know I'd do almost anything for you, but what I'd never do is let you put the rest of us, the other ten, in danger. If you stop eating that shit, some things will change, but I know we can do it. I know you'll still be you.
Things might be harder but if it's what you want, I think it's a good idea, and you'll have me to help you.
no subject
I dunno what I want. I like the way I'm all being now fine, but...shit be going down again, I wanna help.
no subject
I like the way you are now, too, and you don't have to help. But I think that if part of you feels like it's time to go off it, that means you should. And if that's how you feel, I'm making it my job to make sure you do.