07 - [AUField] Destroy All Humans

[chalicejoker]

[A - 2239 Stevens]

[Another day in Mayfield. Hajime is most displeased as he wakes up--he's STILL trapped in Human Undead's form and not his own Joker body. He'd taken that form as a temporary disguise back home, and he had no idea it was going to be forced upon him for such a long time.

Thanks to the needs of this human body, he requires breakfast, so he's in the kitchen attempting to make breakfast...at least until he gets distracted. Continuing to wake up here in Mayfield is such a source of frustration he's smashing most things in the kitchen as he tries to get himself going for the day. Housemates will probably wake up to the sound of breaking dishes or clattering pots and pans.]

[B - Butcher Shop]

[AU or not, Mayfield is still Mayfield, and Hajime would very much like not to get droned...so he's showing up for work today. Unfortunately, he's got a far shorter fuse than usual, and you may or may not get that cut of meat you wanted. His laziness is contributing to the formation of a line complete with a handful of complaining drones, and he can only take so much.

He's just flung a knife at the line. Perhaps he threw it at the drone standing next to you. Perhaps it's flown over the top of your head only to hit the wall behind you. Maybe you've regained superpowers and managed to catch it. Either way...dare you say something to the butcher responsible?]

[C - Around Town]

[Okay, enough work. Hajime is prowling around town, looking for a fight. Any fight. He looks angry...pretty much because he is. Try not to bump into him, because he'll probably punch you unless you're quick. Or go ahead and approach, try to figure out what's got him in such a sour mood.]

[D - Around 2239 Stevens]

[It's late, it's dark out, and Hajime appears to be brooding out in the front yard...and he's just kicked over the trash can for no apparent reason. Approach at your own risk.]

((OOC: Hajime's AU has him embracing his role as the world-destroying Joker Undead and basically left him unable to feel compassion or many emotions outside of his own lust for battle and destruction. He's only satisfied when he's destroying things, and he really hates humans. He'll be a violent brute for the duration of the event. If you've had previous CR with him, feel free to remember it as adjusted to compensate with AU!Hajime being a jerk or if you remember it as it was, he'll just figure he was droned or something that day.))

Comments

I'm sorry for the scary, it just kinda happened! *flails* D:

[chalicejoker]

I do not destroy to eat...and I thought this place considered such things a female's job, anyway.

[The name gives him pause and causes him to growl at her.]

Joker. Do not call me by that ridiculous human name.

[Steal some human's wallet for a temporary name back home and suddenly you've got a name forever, stupid Mayfield...]

Still scary...

[suicidoll]

Even if it does, that doesn't mean you're free to laze around the house and be useless.

(Oh, so he doesn't like that human name? TOUGH

She will bow slightly at the request.)

As you wish...Hajime.

(Because really, when will she obey his wishes Outside of Father's Day?)

Badly scared myself, so yeeeeeeah. ._.

[chalicejoker]

I'll do as I wish.

[He doesn't like anything about humans, pretty much. Human Undead sealed him last time, and he carries a huge grudge. Continuing to call him by that human name clearly isn't going over well with him. He flips over a chair nearby for emphasis.]

Perhaps you need to learn how to listen, human.

[suicidoll]

(If flipping furniture didn't bother Kreutzer when she was normal, then it definitely won't bother her now. She's just laughing right now.)

You're in no position to say such things, Hajime. You killed Floyd, your only protection from me blowing up the entire house with you in it. Perhaps if you grovel at my feet, I'll make sure your death is instant.

[chalicejoker]

As though I would grovel to anyone, let alone the likes of you...and that was bound to happen at one point or another. You know that.

[His belt's coming out now.]

The only other death this morning will be yours.

[And he's turned into Chalice now, so at least he'll be able to better survive any explosions...he's also not waiting for a response, and he is rushing for an attack.]

[suicidoll]

Perhaps so, but couldn't you have at least waited until I had breakfast? This means I'll have to go out and buy my own instead of cooking.

(She observes the transformation with minimal amusement. Can't you be more interesting, Hajime? Rushing directly at her is a bad idea. Why? Because both Lovers and Fortuner are meeting your charge with straight up bullets and a devastating laser.

And don't think about running around, either; Assam here has it covered...with homing missiles!)

[chalicejoker]

[He's not too smart right now, Kreutzer. Joker isn't much of a tactical fighter--he's too used to easily defeating his opponents with just a few strikes. He keeps up the rush as long as he can before taking a few bullets to the chest armor and reeling back to crash into the fridge. Judging by the way it makes him snarl, he's more angry than injured.

He grabs a chair to use as a weapon and is airborne now...although that chair looks to be flying at Assam.]

[suicidoll]

(Hajime, what part of homing missiles did you not understand? They're missiles...that home in on you. And they're damn efficient.

So that chair you have? It's just been shot at...with missiles! And the others will soon re-target you once the chair's no longer a problem...oh, and Fortuner and Lovers are still shooting at you all the while. Kreutzer's enjoying all of this and it shows, if not by the laughter, then the evil smile on her face.)

[chalicejoker]

[At this point, his anger's made him unable to understand more than "DOLL GO BOOM." He's pretty ticked off as he's forced to dive over and behind the counter for shelter from the blasts.

How badly do you want to destroy this kitchen again, Kreutzer?]

[suicidoll]

(She doesn't care if the kitchen gets destroyed. Just like Hajime, it'll come back eventually after being blown up. However, blowing up Hajime would be infinitely more satisfying than blowing up 1000 kitchens.

But just shooting at the counter would be boring. Instead, Kreutzer has Rooty here shoot at it...well, more like through it. Those shots of hers are actually little drills, so they're going right through it with relative ease.)

[chalicejoker]

[Hajime's making various angry growling noises as he scrambles out of the way of those drills. They came way too close! He needs something to counter this, already. About the best he's managing now is to hurl a section of countertop at Kreutzer. It probably won't hit but the action makes him feel much better.]

[suicidoll]

(Of course it's not going to hit. Walls in the way? There's a doll for that. Fast-moving targets? There's a doll for that. Countertops that need to be sliced into pieces? There's a doll for that, too.

Peco, the awesome dual swordsman, just slices it into pieces with minimal effort. With her swords, she also starts lighting several things in the kitchen on fire, preparing to burn the house down and hopefully, Hajime. It's just a matter of holding him here long enough for that to happen.)

[chalicejoker]

[Hajime's deranged monster brain is starting to comprehend the unthinkable--he just might be at a big enough disadvantage in this fight that he could lose.

And he's rushed over to the sink now...he's trying to tear it out of the wall so he can get at the pipes and the water running through them, the better to combat that fire.

But this takes too long, so he'll just settle for hurling the sink at Peco.]

[suicidoll]

(Which, just like the countertop, gets effortlessly sliced to pieces. You have to do better than that, Hajime.

And that's why Kreutzer summons several more Peco dolls, all of which begin lighting sections of the house on fire before quickly converging their attacks on the Kamen Rider himself. That's at least ten flaming swords being swung at you from all directions. Kreutzer's not playing games anymore. Pretty good motivation to visit the Post Office for Joker, isn't it?)

[chalicejoker]

[Well, he might be a proud, stubborn, confident sort of fighter, but even he knows when he's being overpowered.

And he is NOT HAPPY about that. He's dodging the swords as best he can, although he doesn't come away from the encounter without a few gashes on his armor. He's just trying to get out now, and he's wondering why on Earth he hasn't visited the Post Office before now. That should have been the FIRST thing he tried to get back...

He'll be hurling random chunks of rubble at Kreutzer and the dolls as he backs towards a window. When he's close enough to the window, he'll just jump through it to escape. That the window was not open doesn't seem to bother him much.]

[suicidoll]

(Sadly, those chunks get quickly shot down while Kreutzer gives her best condescending laugh. She knows she's pretty much won this fight, all without needing to lift a finger! Oh, how her ego grew...

But while she would love to watch him squirm and bleed to death, she enjoys watching him flee just as much. She'll have one of her Peco dolls chase down Hajime, detonating her bomb when she's close enough. But with her victory, Kreutzer decides it would be best to make her exit now, which she does. Maybe now, she could find others to toy with~)