Drink Count: 29 || Take a look in the mirror and cry Lord what you're doing to me

[eyesofaserpent]

[Aziraphale is gone. Or, well... A drone, more rather. He gets a sense that this might be permanent. It's been several days now and Crowley's gone by 852 Goldberg to check and see if the angel has come out of it yet. But even his wings are gone.

It breaks his heart to see Aziraphale like this. He can never bear to stay long when he comes to check on him. It's like his whole foundation is shattering more, the longer he stays with this shell that was once the angel he desperately loves.

And now also his not!wife is a drone. What the fuck, universe?]


A. [Park: Around Noon]

[Crowley is sitting alone on a bench and feeding the ducks some bread.]


B. [Olney's Tavern: Evening]

[Cowley's behind the bar and drinking a lot more than he usually does. And not even the cocktails he normally drinks, but just scotch on the rocks. Even his wings are starting to become a reflection of his mental state, the normally sleek and immaculate appendages are untidy with the occasional falling feather.]

Comments

[uberboned]

[Oh... Gabriel never met Aziraphale, but it definitely doesn't make for fuzzy feelings when it comes to angels and this place.] And he's...

[Droned. If what Crowley told him before was true and there doesn't seem to be a reason why he'd lie about that.]

[eyesofaserpent]

Yeah...

[And Crowley hates it. Seeing his best friend and lover as a mindless 50s atomaton was heartbreaking.]

His wings are gone, even.

[uberboned]

That's rough, buddy. [Yeah, Gabriel's not... That good at being sympathetic, but at least he looks genuinely upset about it. It helps that... Heaven kinda did that already to most angels. Minus the 50's.]

[eyesofaserpent]

He'll be back... Or I'll get over it. One or the other.

[Except he won't, really. Aziraphale is his other half. He feels incomplete without him. He misses his touch and his gentle voice. His drone has an American accent and it just sounds wrong.]

[uberboned]

[Gabriel doesn't buy it either. He knows people like Crowley- he's a person like Crowley. They don't ever really get over things.

But distractions are always the best.] What you need is a night on the town. Does this town have anything that goes over a PG rating?

[eyesofaserpent]

Not really. There's the tavern, but that's about it.

[uberboned]

So... How boned would we be if we quit our jobs and started a gentleman's club?

[eyesofaserpent]

[He snorts.] I've no bloody clue, mate. But where will we get the girls for it?

[uberboned]

Convince the young and impressionable drone women they all have secret aspirations to be pole dancers?

I saw Pleasantville. I know how this works.

[eyesofaserpent]

[He s t a r e s at him.]





[And then he busts up laughing.]

I want to see you do this, mate.

[uberboned]

Is that a dare? [HE WILL TRY, MAN.

HE WILL TRY.]

[eyesofaserpent]

It is indeed.

[uberboned]

I think I'll start with my wife.

[eyesofaserpent]

I'd do the same, but I think Shana'd kill me.

[uberboned]

Who?

[eyesofaserpent]

My "daughter"... She was close to my "wife" before she was droned. I think they're from the same world.

[uberboned]

Eesh. Never thought I'd be relieved my whole unit's drones. Well... I'm guessing the pet's not. Most people don't have...

[He pauses] I'm not even sure what the hell that thing is.

[eyesofaserpent]

[He raises his eyebrows.]

What does it look like?

[uberboned]

Like Casper the Friendly Ghost decided to go bird-furry.

[eyesofaserpent]

...... That sounds bizarre.

[uberboned]

You should see it in person. I don't know whether I should feed it or exorcise it.