Vash the Stampede (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
collateraldamage) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
mayfield_rpg2012-04-15 10:17 pm
collateraldamage) wrote in mayfield_rpg2012-04-15 10:17 pm
Entry tags:
[001] The Sixty Billion Double Dollar Man
[A: 1248 Williams (Closed to Housemates)]
[Vash would be the first person to say that many of his dreams involved waking up next to a beautiful woman (though sometimes this beautiful woman was made of doughnuts) and so for a long second when he opens his eyes, he thinks that's what this is. Wriggling a bit closer to the poor hapless Makoto, she'll surely appreciate his drool-mumbles... right?]
...'mnot... delicious jelly filling, and...
[Except this dream was just growing more realistic, and Vash was very suddenly aware of two things. The first of which was that he was IN BED WITH A STRANGE WOMAN, and the second of which was that HE WAS ONLY WEARING BOXER SHORTS! The peaceful slumbering air of the room is shattered by a piercing and girlish SCREAM as Vash leaps out of bed and takes the sheets with him, wrapping them around himself to hide his scarred torso... that isn't scarred, wtf Mayfield?!]
[B: Phone (Open to All)]
[Having had things explained a bit more, and after spending a few hours wondering if he'd finally lost his mind to hallucinations and madness, Vash finally decided the time was ripe to introduce himself to his fellow residents. If what had been said was true, and nobody here knew him, then he had a chance to make a good first impression. So the voice that comes over the line is deep and very deliberately manly, with an attempted hint at suave.]
Good afternoon, assorted men, children and, most importantly, beautiful women. The days have been dark here, the nights long and cold so far, and you have been in dire need of some brave soul to rectify all these wrongs.
A man of style. A man of extreme manliness. A man of...
[Wait, he doesn't have another descriptor. He fumbles for a second, before giving a manly cough to cover the awkward pause.]
And what do we call this man among men, this seeker of the elusive mayfly of love, I hear you cry? I am Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz Gombigobilla Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andri Charton-Haymoss Ivanovici Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser III.
[C: Bakery (Open to All)]
[They say an army marches on its stomach, and after giving his very impressive introduction, 'Valentinez' has decided that he most certainly deserves to put something in his. Following the inner glutton compass that pointed directly at sugary goodness, Vash has found his way to the bakery and all its tantalizing smells...
...before realising he has no money. Observe, if you will, the not-at-all-pathetic sight of a grown man with tears running down his cheeks as he presses his nose to the glass.]
[Vash would be the first person to say that many of his dreams involved waking up next to a beautiful woman (though sometimes this beautiful woman was made of doughnuts) and so for a long second when he opens his eyes, he thinks that's what this is. Wriggling a bit closer to the poor hapless Makoto, she'll surely appreciate his drool-mumbles... right?]
...'mnot... delicious jelly filling, and...
[Except this dream was just growing more realistic, and Vash was very suddenly aware of two things. The first of which was that he was IN BED WITH A STRANGE WOMAN, and the second of which was that HE WAS ONLY WEARING BOXER SHORTS! The peaceful slumbering air of the room is shattered by a piercing and girlish SCREAM as Vash leaps out of bed and takes the sheets with him, wrapping them around himself to hide his scarred torso... that isn't scarred, wtf Mayfield?!]
[B: Phone (Open to All)]
[Having had things explained a bit more, and after spending a few hours wondering if he'd finally lost his mind to hallucinations and madness, Vash finally decided the time was ripe to introduce himself to his fellow residents. If what had been said was true, and nobody here knew him, then he had a chance to make a good first impression. So the voice that comes over the line is deep and very deliberately manly, with an attempted hint at suave.]
Good afternoon, assorted men, children and, most importantly, beautiful women. The days have been dark here, the nights long and cold so far, and you have been in dire need of some brave soul to rectify all these wrongs.
A man of style. A man of extreme manliness. A man of...
[Wait, he doesn't have another descriptor. He fumbles for a second, before giving a manly cough to cover the awkward pause.]
And what do we call this man among men, this seeker of the elusive mayfly of love, I hear you cry? I am Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz Gombigobilla Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andri Charton-Haymoss Ivanovici Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser III.
[C: Bakery (Open to All)]
[They say an army marches on its stomach, and after giving his very impressive introduction, 'Valentinez' has decided that he most certainly deserves to put something in his. Following the inner glutton compass that pointed directly at sugary goodness, Vash has found his way to the bakery and all its tantalizing smells...
...before realising he has no money. Observe, if you will, the not-at-all-pathetic sight of a grown man with tears running down his cheeks as he presses his nose to the glass.]
A
[THAT SURE IS SOMEONE'S FIST COMING THROUGH THE FLOOR.
Even for an infernal creature, screams got tiring to listen to after awhile. And she had a nasty headache that she was trying to sleep off and gods you people weren't helping.
She had taken up residence downstairs because she had just...passed out on the couch and never bothered to shift forms and go upstairs instead. So the voice came from the ground floor, though it was loud enough to be from anywhere in the house.
...granted, shouting wasn't very conducive to sleep either. But no one said Okuu was smart.]
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IS THAT A FIST? COMING THROUGH THE FLOOR? WHY IS THERE A FIST IN HIS FLOOR? WHY DOES HE NEVER STAY IN CLASSY ESTABLISHMENTS WHERE UNWANTED FISTS STAY AWAY FROM HIS FLOOR?]
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
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[Though at least the hand has gone away, leaving a ragged hole in the floor.]
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Why does this always happen to me?
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Now if you excuse Okuu she's going to mutter and growl and nurse her aching head and knuckles.]
Ow.
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...ow?
[Oh. It's a girl. Suddenly his head is being poked obnoxiously right through the hole so he can grin at her... upside down.]
Well, hello there! I don't think we got off on the right foot before.
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As it was, she just glares.]
What?
[She's got some massive black ravenlike wings on her back, and her chest seems to be staring at you.
...no really there's a grapefruit-sized eye-shaped jewel with a slit pupil in it. Looking at Vash.]
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I think we got off on the wrong foot... er, fist... before. HAHAHAHAHA.
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Stop shouting.
[She seems rather unamused, for her part. Recovering from concussions tended to make one grumpy.]
no subject
[He rubs the back of his head sheepishly, which looks very silly upside down.]
Did I frighten you?
no subject
No, you made my head hurt.
[This necessitated punching the ceiling, clearly.]
no subject
[Have a cheesy thumbs up... which is a thumbs down upside down, fail.]
no subject
Then she reaches up with one hand and shoves this strange human's head back up through the hole in the ceiling/floor like an extraneous light fixture.
YEAH SHE'S THAT TALL but there's a lot more than the expected level of strength there regardless.
Wait until she starts pitching cars!]no subject
Flopping back up into the bedroom with an ungraceful squawk, he wriggled worm-like over the floor to peer down again.]
Can I at least get a name?
no subject
[...at least, that grumble kind of sounded like a name. She's already started to shuffle off to elsewhere in the house where it might be quieter.]
no subject
I hope we see each other later, Miss Utsuho!