(no subject)

[artisticull]

[ Phone - Evening ]

Ladies and gentletrolls, wigglers of all ages, welcome to the dark carnival Come for the juggling and stay for the subjugglating! See most amazing of chucklevoodoos I got just for you.

This motherfucker's done gone and finally saw he went mutant underneath this fake fucking husk of his. And it's all going clownhill from here.

Motherfuck, does a brother need to be peeling every peach-skin to get down to the meat of his business?



[ Action - Evening - Immediate Vicinity of 1336 Benny Road ]

[ There is a horrifyingly large human sitting atop his rooftop in the evening hours, dressed well but with cosmetics smeared all over his face to approximate his usual greasepaint. He's freakishly tall, looming as his face is pulled into a vicious snarl that is not nearly as intimidating as it should have been when he had fangs. He's just watching and waiting for now, but anyone unfortunate enough to walk by the house and not look up as they do so will be greeted with a deep: ] HONK!

[ An increasingly agitated one. If one more peach-skinned hornless motherfucker greets him in a friendly fashion, he's going to jump clear off of there and rip their head off.

He might do that anyway.

After all, the fact that there's a little splash of blood on the sidewalk gives away that he's already done something similar once. This is exactly how you investigate getting turned into a filthy red-blooded alien. ]

Comments

Action! I need this CR like burning.

[l3g1sl4t1ng]

[Perhaps you won't recognize her. Perhaps you will. Redglare was still human, but she was wearing her legislacerator costume. Her red glasses were perched on her nose.]

Well, well, well. It was hard to recognize your smell with you being a pink hornless creature. But I recognize that honk from anywhere.

When did you arrive Grand Highblood? I apologize for not properly welcoming you to our new location. It seems I have been out for awhile. For many long human days, so they call them. [She was just recently dedroned.]

You sound angry, dear Highblood.

yesss, all the CR

[artisticull]

[ It's probably better that she's not in troll form right now, otherwise he might have flipped his shit in a none too friendly fashion. No teal-blood deserved better than what he had gone and woke up as. ]

Well, if it ain't a wicked motherfuckin' little sister. You got all real observant all up in this, yeah?

[ He moves adroitly to the edge of the rooftop, looking down on her. And then he chuckles suddenly. ]

Get up here and lay down some noise all on this brother's hearstubs. You tell me what the motherfuck happened.

[phone]

[polariity]

[Really]

[Really]

Are you fucking kidding me.

[artisticull]

[ Oooh, people talking back. That makes his rant all the better, really. ]

Heh, this ain't the joke, motherfucker. But I'm about to make you the fuckin' punchline, you get me?

[hisnameisthecaptain]

I don't know what you just said, but ☠☠☠☠ you.

[artisticull]

[ Excuse him while he chuckles. ]

What all did you just say? Speak the fuck up.

phone, not here;

[nosigntospeakof]

[Oh.

Shit.]

nope, not here at all, 2/idek

[nosigntospeakof]

[No no no no nooooooooo no no no.]

[Phone]

[cullionfish]

[FINALLY, SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T FUCKING SUCK.

The delight and near relief in her tone is palpable. The past few weeks have been the most unamusing thing ever, and she's been waiting for some good entertainment.]

My dearest Subjugglator, what a pleasure it is to see you've joined us here as well.

[artisticull]

Your motherfuckin' majesty--

[ He sounds legitimately surprised. They dared to take Her? ]

This brother always be at your service. You tell me what you want this fuckin' clown to do. It's done.

[Action]

[myblimpisbigger]

[Hello, fellow gigantic human. You're something new and interesting. Why are you on the roof and why are you honking? You could just say 'hello', you know.]

I don't think anyone has ever honked at me to get my attention before. What do you want?

[artisticull]

[ Silly tall human, hello doesn't scare the lowbloods like a good solid honk does. ]

Then you ain't never made the fuckin' pleasure of acquaintin' with a subjugglator, brother. [ He prowls along the edge of the roof, distinctly displeased with the human form he's been trapped in. It's not nearly as limber as a troll. ]

Looks like I'm all here to fix that. So what the motherfuck is going on here?

[phone] - 1/2

[crusthatecean]

[well fuck

this can't be good at all

he's just going to...gently hang up the phone...]

[action; later]

[crusthatecean]

[But later, he'll be walking down the street back to his own hive. No, he's not looking up at the roof, but does being a grey-skinned nubby horned motherfucker grant him a pass?

Probably not, but he doesn't notice anything is wrong until he hears that one word that instantly makes his bloodpusher want to jump out of his chest, because it is so familiar, and this time that absolutely wasn't Gamzee.

He freezes in place, and slowly looks up.]

[imperial_ray]

Went... mutant? What does that mean?

[artisticull]

Mutant, sister. Got the red filth that be all running through my veins.

[miraculls]

[oh my god clown puns and carnival references where have you been all his life]

Shit, be that a fellow worshipper of the Mirthful Messiahs what is all reaching my motherfuckin' sponge clots? Bro, I dunno about clownhill, because I am all about jumping out my polka-dotted garb from exhilariousation here.

[artisticull]

Heh, my hearstubs just caught themselves some of the wicked fuckin' word. Don't be kickin' all kinds of motherfuckin' ignorance, little brother.

[ He chuckles. ]

This motherfucker right all here is the Grand Highblood.

[Phone]

[frothymilk]

[SCREAM]

[Only not really, because Equius doesn't do that sort of thing. He barely even picks up the phone. But he is so very happy that he did.]

[A Highb100d. A real Higb100d, who is sober and knows exactly how to treat those beneath him.]

[He has no idea what to say to him - NO. He knows exactly what to say to him.]

Highblood. If I may be so bold as to request the location of your hellmirth-making, I wish to come and pay tribute to your arrival.

[He doesn't care if the revival system sucks now, for the chance to be properly subjugglated, he would endure all]

[artisticull]

That so? Is that fuckin' so? Those words you be laying down are like musical miracles to my motherfuckin' hearstubs, lowblood.

[ There's a pause and then a laugh.

It's not a nice laugh. ]

I need paint. This indibrother's all at some place marked thirteen-thirty-six. Find it and bring it to me.

Phone

[omlettedufromage]

[You can hear Dexter quivering in the phone. Especially at the mention of carnival. Clowns are scary, okay?]

Carnival....? Clowns are scary...

[artisticull]

Scary? Motherfuckin' scary? You don't know fear 'til you got one of my clown brothers all up in your pan, giving you the voodoos.

[ Not... exactly true. But it's all part of the set-up, now onto the punchline. ]

Or maybe you all done got one of those. Let's check. DO I MOTHERFUCKIN' GET YOU YOUR FRIGHT ON? Honk.

Action;

[spaceshadowfax]

[...What is even happening on the roof next door to her house? Sexy is unamused to say the least but her curiosity gets the better of her. She leaves the kitchen, exiting the house through the garage and walking to the white picket fence that separates their yards.

Her expression isn't friendly per say but more intrigued.]

You must be new.

[artisticull]

Shit, sister, you must be all getting your oracularizing on. How the fuck did you know?

[ Is that a joke? No telling. But his attention is fully on her. ]

1336 Benny

[prissy_hooves]

[Rarity's trotting on by, just minding her own business, when a loud honking sound very nearly frightens her right out of her skin. An instinctive chill runs down her spine as she slowly lifts her head to gaze upon the Highblood in all his glory.]

Ah... yes. And a most hearty honk to you as well.

1/2

[artisticull]

[ Holy shit, is that an indigo fucking pony?!

He hadn't gotten a good look at it at first, but now... ]

phone;

[cullscuttlefish]

[Oh shit.

That's all Feferi can think for a few minutes. She doesn't recognize the exact voice, no, but she sure as hell recognizes the terms he's throwing about. And all she can think of? Getting him on her side.]

It's a very strange thing, to awaken not in one's own husk. But it will come back. Along with the correct blood color.

This is a place called Mayfield, and the first thing it does to trolls is change their form. You're in a human body for now, but give it time and at least one horrible event - one caused by the town - and you'll be yourself again.

Ah, my apologies. I've been rude. I'm Feferi Peixes, the heiress to the throne.

[She hates that it means so much to the Alternian Old Guard, but she can play the game for now, and hope to change it later.]

[artisticull]

[ A snarl rises up in his throat as she speaks, but it cuts off abruptly as she introduces herself.

The Heiress.

Lacking orders from the Condesce to chop her into itty bitty pieces, his only option is acted upon without a second thought. ]

Well, let this brother get his motherfuckin' gratitude on with you, your Highness.

[darrrling]

The changes are only temporary, darling! No need to worry so much. Are you quite all right, baby?

[ Milla no what are you doing. Sob she's used to people who are fucked in the head, comes with her job... ]

[artisticull]

Does this fuckin' brother sound all right to you? All right? Yeah. Yeah. He's got all kinds of motherfuckin' all right going on here. I'm chill.

[chastesaw]

*Oh, no. He's talking in a way that reminds her of Gamzee, only completely unlike Gamzee. Which does not bode well, really. But one thing is coming to mind, given the events of the prior weeks...*

Can you... not talk about blood? *In a strained voice.*

[artisticull]

Don't got no stomach for it? This filthy null shit running through your veins?

Action

[photonicfighter]

[Dakki may well have noticed the enormous fellow on top of the roof if not for the HONK. The HONK stops her short on her evening stroll. She turns, she looks up, she stares...

Gamzee? No. No, no, nooooo. It's like someone took adorable Gamzee and multiplied him by YIKES.]

...what?

[The expression on her pale purple face shows that she'd like to comment further, but words are... just sort of failing her.]

[artisticull]

Honk, honk, HONK, baby sister. [ He tilts his head, leaning forward over the edge of the roof. ]

Come here. COME THE FUCK HERE. Bring me that pretty little head.

[Phone]

[cawtier]

Oh man, is this another ICP troll? Only the cool kind, not the dorky drugged up kind?

This is gonna be so sweet. I'm just sad the internet is not a thing that exists right now.

[artisticull]

[ Aaand none of that made any sense whatsoever. Defaulting to blasphemy. ]

Shit, shit, got me some sort of blasphemator all up in this business? What the motherfuck is all this noise you got spewing?

action

[corrodes]

[The Handmaid pauses what can only be The Grand Highblood's honk. There's no doubt he's human, but she doesn't look at him, although she doesn't keep walking, either. Judging by the blood on the sidewalk he's already gotten down to some sort of business.]

Yes?

[artisticull]

Good motherfuckin' evening, sister. Got some words to share with this motherfucker? Get the fuck over here.

Action;

[a1a100]

[Well that scared the shit out of Sol. He turns around sharply.]

Gamzee, what the fu--

[This was not the indigo blood he knew. He's going to raise an eyebrow and back away a little bit.]

Who the hell are you?

[artisticull]

Welcome to the motherfuckin' Carnival of Carnage. I'm your fuckin' ringmaster, the prophet of pain, the Grand motherfuckin' Highblood.

And who-

[ A pause as he moves to descend from his perch. ]

-the motherfuck-

[ There's a thump as the huge man hits the ground. ]

-are you?

[Action]

[shesapir8]

[And Mindfang will stop in her lazy stroll around town, quirking an eyebrow at that display. The make up is familiar, the honk another sign and finally she calls up.]

Highblood?

[In her own troll body she feels near invincible compared to his weak human one. But that won't stop her erring on the side of caution.]

sorry about the delay, I caught the flu :o(

[artisticull]

[ The laugh in response is probably better fitting a hyena than a highly ranked member of nobility, but that was just the way he went with things. ]

Heheh, well motherfuck. You... you... heh.