❄ sixteenth reminder

[echidna]

[ phone ; fail filtered to the ladies of mayfield ]

Uh... hi...

[ someone is sounding a little awkward. ]

So I think I am a woman now, or my flower has bloomed, or some other metaphor for getting my period, but that happened and it's not like I haven't read about periods online but actually getting it is kind of, um-

Can someone... help me?

[ 1338 benny ]

[ Jade has cloistered herself in the bathroom; the cord of the phone stretches beneath the door. Sounds of distress come from within. ]

Comments

phone; make this action later?

[yearthatneverwas]

Jade? This is Martha. I'm a friend of the Doctor's, and I'm a doctor myself. I'm going to come over with the things you'll need. When I get there, you can ask me any questions you have.

...I know it's going to quite possibly make you want to stab every boy you know around your age in the gut, but don't. Tell them to bring you chocolate or ice cream, and if they can't or won't, tell them to bugger off.

[echidna]

[ Hearing that she's the Doctor's friends puts her at ease, and she sounds relieved. ]

Really? Thanks! [ She giggles a little at the last bit. ] I don't think I wanna stab anyone... yet.

Your filters suck Jade!!!!!!!

[a1a100]

...periods? You mean there's another meaning to the word?

[echidna]

[ fffffffffffffffffffff ]

Uh, so trolls don't have them? The non punctuation kind.

[chastesaw]

...what?

[echidna]

It's just a human thing...

[con_heir]

Oh geez.

I don't think I was supposed to hear this!

So I probably shouldn't have said anything and just hung up quietly instead of continuing to babble like a moron and okay I should probably shut up now huh.

[echidna]

John!!!!

You should have just not answered at all because this phone call was not even for you!

[godcomplexed]

[just...

Silence.

...

Hangs up.]

because I have to jack this

[yearthatneverwas]

Doctor.

I am on my way over and I will handle this. What I need you to do is keep the other troll kids out of the way. Do your light show or something.

phone

[crusthatecean]

Sure, but you'll have to come out of the hygiene block and also explain exactly what the problem is.

[echidna]

I am NOT coming out of the bathroom and you are not even supposed to be listening to this!

[foretaste]

OH MY GOD I READ ABOUT THIS. YOU ARE HEMORRHAGING BLOOD OUT OF YOUR HUMAN LADY-GAPER.

JADE

JADE

YOU SHOULD GO TO THE HOSPITAL!!!

1/2

[echidna]

[ AUGH FUCK WHAT the yelling draws some sort of surprised shriek from Jade and she hangs the fuck up. ]

Phone

[balaton]

Oh, congratulations!

[echidna]

Um... thank you? I think.

[cawtier]

[Dave sounds like he's in pain. In a way, he is.]

Awesome. Yes. Fuck yes. I totally wanted to hear about this. Goddamn you do not know how much I needed to hear this. God fucking damn, today is great. Just what I needed, the mental thought of you staining your pants staining my brain like you're staining your pants.

Would that I had hands so I could just take these iShades and throw them on the floor in disgust. They've betrayed me for the last time.

[echidna]

[ You know who else is in pain? JADE! Womanly pain! ]

Oh my god, shut up!

[busy_fists]

[If Jade's listening hard enough, she might hear a distant voice in the background.]

Honey? You might want to take this one.

[echidna]

Um... hello?

[Phone]

[hisnameisthecaptain]

What...?

Why the ☠☠☠☠ are you calling for? Go ask a mom in the house or go to the pharmacy and ask them...

[echidna]

It was an accident! You could at least be a little more polite.

[noluckduck]

Oh, Jesus fuckin' Christ. Girl, what're ya doin' talkin' about it on the phone?

[echidna]

My house is full of boys and trolls and a spaceship!

[miraculls]

[oh hey Gamzee's got this covered, he totally knows what Jade's talking about here

knocks on the bathroom door about twenty minutes after she makes the call]

Hey, hivesis, you still in there? I got you flowers like you were all asking for!

[echidna]

[ noooooooo gamzee nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ]

That's not- uh... [ what a good boytrollfriendsprit :'c ] thanks.

[dwaggies]

Ah, they grow up so fast...!

[echidna]

I don't actually think I'm a woman yet.

[best_weapon_ever]

[Tsubaki feels slightly embarrassed for her.]

What kind of help do you need. And do you have any, uhm, supplies? I could bring you some.

[echidna]

I do now! It's nice of you to offer, though. I really wish I had an older sister or something...

phone;

[sara_mudou]

I-is someone coming to help you yet? I have, ah, things if you need them.

[echidna]

Someone helped me out, so I'm okay now. Just kind of embarrassed now.

Phone

[strike_you_out]

[so confused]

You got a what?

[echidna]

You don't know what a period is?

[ Sure, he's a boy, but don't people educate themselves?? ]

[wweh]

[Well it couldn't be bad about asking about this... right...?]

What the fuck is that?

[echidna]

[ gee thanks moirail you are doing a good job comforting her in this trying time. ]

It's a human thing.

phone;

[spaceshadowfax]

Oh, so you've started menstruating. Congratulations? I assume that's what you're supposed to say.

[echidna]

I guess you can say congratulations. Other people have.

You don't get periods, do you?

phone;

[soveryhuman]

Oh. Well. [ Poor girl. Much nicer about these things than Amy used to be at first, though. ] You're already getting a lot of advice and everything, looks like, but if you still need help with something, I'm a nurse, so don't be afraid to ask. Rory Williams. Nice to meet you.

[echidna]

Hi Rory! [ Hmmm, that name sounds familiar...... ] Are you the Doctor's friend?

phone

[werejew]

Oh, you're a woman now! Mazel tov!

Don't worry, it only happens, like, one a year and shit. [no that's wrong don't listen]

[echidna]

Are you sure? I thought it was supposed to be once a month.

[Phone]

[ceasetoexist]

Oh wow thank you so much for telling us all this! Really is something we all needed to know!

[echidna]

Well I wouldn't expect a little boy to understand the kinds of things grown women go through.

Phone 1/2

[promfromhell]

[Carrie freezes as she hears the word period and suddenly she's back in a locker-room with people shouting at her. Throwing things...All she wanted was help. She just wanted help....

And then the girl asks for help.]

2/2

[promfromhell]

....Do you still need help?

I got mine a while before I came here...

[At the early age of seventeen....Oh well. A teenage girl and not a boy, that's at least one plus.]

I can help if you'd like.

[autosmuppet]

[ SORRY SISTER NOT TOUCHING THIS ONE ]

[echidna]

[ And no one is more thankful for that than Jade. ]