twenty eight | what is love

[strike_you_out]

[Rather than read the assigned acts of Romiette and Juleo, or whatever it was called, Slugger is finding every imaginable reason to procrastinate. He discovers that knocking icicles off the roof and shoveling the driveway are good excuses for wasting time, though he finishes both a bit too quickly. After the last of the snow has been shoveled from the driveway, he turns to empty the mailbox and idly flips through its contents piece by piece.

There's nothing remarkable in the mail today, only a few envelopes, a post card, and a magazine. The magazine, at least, he could mutilate later for fun. On the back cover is an ad featuring the title "Young Love" in which a little girl is pictured kissing the cheek of a little boy. Slugger pauses. Young love? Dropping the snow shovel, he looks up, wide-eyed and silent as if stricken with a sudden realization.]


Phone

[Slugger gives the telephone a long and apprehensive stare before he dares to pick it up. Holding it to his ear, he opens his mouth to speak... then quickly hangs up. Several deep breaths later he tries again, this time with more success.]


Hi.


What do you do when--

[He briefly freezes up, near horrified at what he's about to admit.]


...when you think you love a girl?

Comments

[strike_you_out]

[You can't see it, but you might be able to hear him wrapping his fingers in the phone cord uneasily.]

Yeah. Go.

[ukelelenogood]

Ready? Okay, here we go.

Frogs.

Get her pet frogs.

Girls love frogs.

[strike_you_out]

But it's winter.

[ukelelenogood]

Which brings me to my second point.

You need to wait for spring. That's the lovers season.

Telling someone you like them during winter is like saying "You remind me of snow: cold and inevitably fading away". That ain't romantic.

[strike_you_out]

There's snow in spring, too.

[ukelelenogood]

Late spring, smartass, after the snow is gone and it's on the cusp of summer.

I'm sorry, I forgot who the expert on girls was here. You actually a little girl in disguise or something? You wanna tell me more about what girls like or don't like? Do ya? Do ya?

[strike_you_out]

No. But summer is far away... She could disappear. Or I could.

[ukelelenogood]

Oh okay.

Then kiss her.

[strike_you_out]

[He isn't sure about this, but he won't rule out the possibility that she may be on to something.]

And then what?

[ukelelenogood]

Then kiss her again!

[strike_you_out]

Shouldn't I say something?

[ukelelenogood]

Yeah you should.

With your lips.

[strike_you_out]

[Everyone talks with their lips, Haurko! Except Death.]

...But what?

[ukelelenogood]

It was a joke kid.

It was another way of saying kiss her.

Keeping kissing her.

Never stop. Ever.

[strike_you_out]

What if she wants to say something?

[ukelelenogood]

Then stop for a moment.

Let her say something.

Then kiss her again.

[strike_you_out]

[It sounds risky.]

What if she says to stop and go away?