06 - Welcome Home, Honey

[spitefulvitae]

[919 Bilko, Morning - Limited to Housemates]

[Another beautiful Mayfield morning dawns, but all is not well in the Goodman household. That pleasant drone wife has been replaced with someone far stiffer, deader, and somewhat mildewed-smelling. That alone might be bad enough. But she had been quite silent while things were dark. Now that there's sun, there's screaming.

As soon as the first sufficiently brilliant rays of light come pouring into the room, Natalie bursts from her spot on the bed with an inhuman shriek. She tears the blankets off the bed and wraps them around herself, but it's not nearly enough protection against the light. She can't see, with all of the brightness and all of the fabric covering her... it's making her efforts to find some sort of cover far too slow. A hand has crept out from the covers, and it's fumbling at the doorknob for the closet... it's also sizzling.]

OhgodohgodthesunnotthesunohfatherpleasenonotthesunfatherhelpmenoNONONOnonono...

[Around Town, Evening]

[It's a warm late-summer evening. A perfect time for light blouses and short sleeves. To hell with that, tonight. Not after the kind of morning Natalie had been through. Every inch of her is covered by clothing. Long sleeves cover her arms. Gloves cover her fingers. Her usual scarf is wrapped very, very high along her face. And her hair is even pulled forward to obscure her face even further, with just a slit left to allow for vision.

Really, the malfunctioning drones are a mercy, tonight. She needs blood, and lots of it, if she's going to be presentable anytime soon. Were you being annoyed by a particularly persistent drone asking the time or wishing you a good evening?]

...oh. Here. Let me take care of that...

[And she'll just be grabbing them, exposing their neck, and sinking her fangs in. Masquerade, shmasquerade. What was there to cover up, here? She was doing everyone a favor, honestly.]

Comments

[keep_smiling]

[This is Mayfield, to hell with the Masquerade. Elmer will just blink at this for a moment before slapping on a smile.]

Yes, that sure did take care of that!

[spitefulvitae]

[Natalie can't reply right away. It takes a while to drain a drone. Thankfully, it's gone pretty passive. It has a pleasant drone-look on its face the whole while.

When she's done, she simply drops the body on the sidewalk. She's quick to pull her scarf back up over her mouth, but there's enough time to catch that her face has been burnt.]

I just hate to see people being bothered, I do....

[keep_smiling]

[Just

gonna stand there

this is sort of fascinating, really. 312 years old, and he's never seen this before.]

Ah! Natalie, is that you under there?

[spitefulvitae]

[Hooray for new experiences! Especially new experiences for the astonishingly old.

Natalie quirks her head sharply when she hears him use her name.]

Yes. It's me. And you're... Elmer, right?

[A sudden laugh escapes her.]

It's been a while!

[keep_smiling]

Right! It has been a bit, hasn't it! [He looks down at the dead drone, then back to Natalie.] So, you're a vampire, then?

[spitefulvitae]

The town keeps you busy, I suppose? [She, meanwhile, is paying the drone no mind.]

Yes. I am. Although I don't think that I was one, the last time we talked...

[keep_smiling]

Sometimes! The job is repetitive but the people are great.

No, because I would remember that. I've always wanted to meet a vampire!

[spitefulvitae]

Now you have! Congratulations.

...what kind of job did the town give you, again? [She quirks her head.]

[keep_smiling]

Is being a vampire anything like in the movies?

Ah, I'm a used car salesman. I managed to sell every car on the lot one day, and since then, business has been rather slow.

[spitefulvitae]

I suppose that depends on the kind of movies you've been watching. Twilight, no. Dracula, no. Interview With The Vampire.... eeeh, maybe...?

[Such skill as a salesman! That gets another sharp laugh from her.] Did you sell them all to drones? Is it slow for a lack of inventory, or a lack of customers?

[keep_smiling]

Never heard of Twilight, but I know the other two! I suppose I shouldn't expect it to be like in films. That would be like giving away all your important secrets.

All to drones. The rest of us don't really seem to have a use for new cars, since there's one in every driveway already.

[spitefulvitae]

Hm! [Doesn't know Twilight? Either he's from a world with good taste, or from a few years back. Interesting to consider. She laughs.]

Thankfully, none of the movies have ever gotten it quite right... I like having some secrets.

I hope that it's not making things too hard for you. Don't car salesmen get paid on commission?

[keep_smiling]

[From 2002 after spending 5 years sequestered away in a village cut off from the rest of society! Aww yeah.]

That would take away a lot of the fun.

I don't really worry about it. The drone boss seems happy, and it's not like we don't have all the necessities already. Roof over our heads, food in the pantry, car in the driveway. Getting paid isn't much of a worry.

[spitefulvitae]

We've got to keep people guessing, hmm? A little mystery is interesting.

[She laughs a little, but it's kind of dark. Right, right, interested, mystery... more about keeping your hide preserved.]

I've never been very clear on where the money comes from in the household. Up until now, I've had a drone husband. And they wouldn't dare miss work or slack off, would they? If you don't work, do you still get paid the same?

[keep_smiling]

I never looked at my pay stubs. I suppose I should!