17 July 2012 @ 01:40 am
1st Shoe of Baileys - Action/Phone  
[Action - Locked to 951 Beuluh]

[How do you like being woken up in bed, Carlton?

Because when you wake up this morning you'll feel some very warm, very heavy breathing at the back of your neck. What's even worse is the salty, sewage-waste smell of the breath as well.

If you turn around you'll see quite possibly one of the most horrible looking creatures in front of you from it's horrid green skin and sea weed hair down to the thin mustache it has and unnecessarily red lipstick it has smeared around it's mouth. And it is just staring back at you Carlton.

Just. Staring. Until it speaks.]

Why you in Old Gregg's bed, motherlicker?


Old Gregg don't all like this. No sir. Old Gregg was happy being back at his nice old pond, scaring ducks and eating spiders. Didn't have no desire to be getting dragged all back to this witch town.

Know what Gregg thinks? You know what? Gregg thinks you all played a trick on Old Gregg. Yes sir. You all just made him think he was back home when he was really just here. All put a big old picture of his nice cave and just been tricking him like that.

Old Gregg don't like that. No sir.

Old Gregg gonna find out who tricked him. And then Old Gregg gonna tear their legs off and use them as crutches.




[Action - Around Town]

[With everything that's wrong with this town (most notably lack of Baileys) there is one thing Gregg enjoys about the town. And that's the fact that he has a car he's allowed to drive here.

Around town today there is a little white car just tear assing around town. Maybe he's driving donuts on your lawn or maybe he just barely missed running you down in the street. But either way its the same.

And all the time he is just keeping his head out the window, giving the only warning he can as his car comes careening barely under control.]