[these moments when he can't ignore how closely Cain and Abel resemble each other...]

I don't get sick at all, you should know this. [because apparently there isn't a difference between "can't catch a cold" and "being unaffected by anything imbibed", so it totally doesn't need explaining! if anything needs explaining here, it's this sudden bizarre semi-confession]

I wasn't aware you had such morbid humor. What was it, then? A cleaner of some sort? Fiberglass? [CHARLES... what's worse is he's saying this all in a completely serious way, like these are actually things he'd consider a joke.]