17 September 2012 @ 12:20 am
027  
... So. Um.

Annie-- the other Annie, not me, the Librarian one-- just sorta fucked off into a portal to a fucking wasteland? She's going to go get stronger so she can help us kick that Jonathan dude's ass. She says thanks for all the people who brought her shit, and we all just gotta stay strong and have hope and shit. Kinda too Disney for me, but whatever, she was pretty cool. Kinda hot. [SHE WAS AN OLD LADY...]

Also the whole world was destroyed in a war and shit. Ghosts in the machine. Mayfield will be made perfect. Everyone wants to die. The failure must be corrected. "I am Zemekis. I am Lucille. I am Mayfield. And I am awake."

[She groans loudly, and the sound of a head hitting a table can be heard.] This shit is way too heavy for me. Fuck everything.
 
 
11 July 2012 @ 09:48 pm
026  
[Phone]

Ding. Mother. Fucking. Dong.

Guess what lucky bitch woke up this morning to find her worst fucking enemy going around like the fucking Brady Bunch or some shit? Yeah, that's right, that'd be me. The fucking winner.

In case any of you guys are too fucking stupid to know what I'm talking about, lemme put it in plain English for you: The Major is droned. Like, droned-droned. No more uniform, no more stupid fucking robot body-- trust me, I checked. [don't ask how, it was pretty graphic] He's gone. Anybody wanted proof of a merciful God, there it fucking is.

For anyone who wants to pay their last respects, the service will be at Makeout Point. Just look for the ten foot tall flames; you'll get there.

[Action: Makeout Point]

[It's more like five feet, but nobody ever accused Annie of being a boy scout. Or good at math.

Annie herself is a few feet away from the smoldering remains, lying down by the edge with her legs kicking off the side. There. It's done. The last person who knows everything she's done is gone for good.

... Well, almost the last person. But she can take care of that.]
 
 
28 June 2012 @ 07:53 pm
025 also spanish computers hate english punctuation bear with me  
[Lord knows yáll have missed hearing this sweet dulcet tone over the phones. And, per usual, Annie is only concerned about the most important part of the recent happenings.]

So, I don´t know why everybody is so fucking concerned about me lately, I´m totally fucking fine. [a beat] And I fucking hate libraries. Books are for nerds.
 
 
14 May 2012 @ 01:09 am
024  
[For some reason or another, you're walking by 1667 Nelson Street. The first thing you'll notice is that the Major is hanging from a lamp post, decked out in his Nazi best. Upside down, actually, by a rope tied to his ankles. Annie is sitting in a lawn chair next to him, smoking nonchalantly. There is a metal baseball bat at her feet; the bat has a few nails driven through it. There is also a paper sign next to her: THREE SWINGS, FIVE CENTS

Batter. Fucking. Up.]

(Order is your character -> annie -> major. enjoy.)
 
 
13 April 2012 @ 01:06 am
023  
[An apparently distressed Mart makes an early morning phone call.]

Oh, God.

Oh, God, I have a penis.

What do I do with it it's just sitting there it's weird what's happening someone fucking help me you fucking assholes I hate all of you.
 
 
14 March 2012 @ 12:58 am
022  
Hello, Mayfield girls ages 11 to 13, have I got the deal of the fucking century for you!

So, basically, I have this adorable little friend who I won't name but his name's Luke, and during that time with the weird fucking flowers, I was a total bitch and rejected his love because he is A. super tiny and B. a boy. But I still felt totally bad about it. SO, to make up for breaking his little baby heart, I've decided to do the right thing and find him a cute little girl to fill the void I left in his soul. It's gonna be hard, but I'm just so nice I don't even care.

To qualify, you must be in that age range, a girl, be adorable, and like puzzles and riddles and other nerdy shit like that. Having a bangin' ass would be a plus. Reply now because he is going fast!
 
 
30 January 2012 @ 01:25 am
021  
[They're all out to get her.

Annie is stumbling through Mayfield, having recently found herself in the middle of Mayfield, that awful goddamn factory nowhere to be seen. Oh, but she knows it's there. She knows they're there. Watching her. Waiting. Waiting for her to slip up. Waiting to kill her.

And every person around her was waiting, too.

She'll just have to kill them first.

She continues walking towards a safe space that doesn't exist, her one remaining eye darting around wildly. Yeah. She'll just have to kill them first.]

(OOC NOTE: IF SHE BITES YOU YOU WILL GET THE RABIES

IT'S LIKE OL' YELLER IF OL' YELLER COULD TELL YOU TO FUCK OFF WITH THAT SHOTGUN BULLSHIT)
 
 
14 January 2012 @ 10:02 pm
020 ⚸  
[This morning, you will definitely hear the blaring alarms from the dairy. However, you may hear another alarm, something a bit more familiar: A police siren. One of Mayfield's police cars is barreling down the roads, sidewalks, and front yards of the neighborhood with very little consideration for anyone in its path, drone and normal folk alike. However, the person driving it is clearly not one of Mayfield's finest; it's a woman, for starters! A woman in yellow sheep pajamas.

Annie has jacked the Major's police car and, with a six pack and a blunt safely secured in the passenger's seat (the only thing in the car wearing a seatbelt...), is taking it for a joyride.

She may also be pulling over anyone driving to work, just for shits and giggles. And also trying to pick up sexy ladies in her hot ride. And blaring her horn next to the houses of her enemies. There are options.]